I love how this is me everytime any sort of traumatic event happens to me: haha lol someone broke into my house while I was in the bathroom lmao, it's a good thing they didn't check in there, would hate for them to catch me with my pants down haha get it? Get it? I know I'm crying from pure terror, ignore that, is the joke funny or not?
The depression brings about whimsy because it's the only thing that keeps me from totally falling apart.
it didn't actually happen. I don't think. Just my brain hearing noises outside and going "Yep that's someone here to kill you." It happens dw no one broke in
But I definitely did think someone did and I even texted my friend while crying 100% convinced I was gonna die. And I made that exact same joke. About getting caught with my pants down. I actually made multiple jokes. A concerning amount for someone who thought they were about to die.
Lowkey I hate the fact that I had to verify my email again
Cus I use my mother's phone and her email storage was full so when I cleared all that itch just hit me with a "Hey girlie!☺️ You're not getting your account back."
SO I HAD TO MAKE A NEW ONE AND SPENT LIKE 1000+ HOURS LOOKING FOR THIS GROUP AGAIN FROM THE OLD COMMENTS ON MGM BECAUSE I DIDNT HAVE IT BOOKMARKED ON CHROME
WHAT YOU TALK ABOUT PNEUMONIA LIKE "oh yeah it was nothing" BRO PNEUMONIA CAN BE FATAL (I say like that isn't literally the exact way I talked about that one time I almost died)
im fine reallyy it wasnt that bad oh elon musk removed the like option so now everyone's using different versions of the MII "Yeah!" thing and i keep seeing the hatsune miku version..
I'm sure you can already tell, but I am not doing good! In fact, I'm doing very very shit rn! School is kicking my ass, the ACTs are kicking my ass, my entire life is kicking my fucking ass.
So, needless to say, I am this fucking close to losing my shit, but it's okay! I can always go find it later! Anyway, I need to go scream and cry into my pillow for the next hour.
It is really difficult to resist the urge to be mean sometimes.
Like the other day my class was in the gc talking about colors for our senior uniform next year (the seniors get a specialized uniform and other perks and such) and I was trying to push for a CMYK color pallette but my class pretty much ignored my existence so whatever, I stopped caring and let them decide amongst themselves. They're big boys they can deal with it.
That's when someone privately messaged me. This bitch named Karma who was all like "I'm sure you know who I am" like- okay, whatever, Karma. And she's all like "did you vote for the uniform color?" So I said no.
She then said to look at the colors and see which one I liked best, and the contest was between these two colors, blue and purple. I went blue because I like it more than purple and if I'm pushing for CMYK, it is in my interest to pick the blue. I tell her this and she's like "oh but... don't you wanna pick the purple though?"
Oh is that what this is? You're not being all nice to me and asking if I voted because you actually care. You just want me to vote for the one you want. Okay, Karma. Fine. I'll vote for the purple if it'll make you shut the fuck up.
Is what I would have said if I wasn't trying to be nice. So I just went "okay purple ig" and voted purple. Then ignored her "thank you" message cause, frankly, you couldn't pay me to give a shit.
I had to actively resist calling every single one of my classmates brain dead assholes yesterday. They're all actually so annoying and I could keep telling stories about how much they piss me off, but I think you get the point.
If only saying "how the fuck did you make it past third grade" was okay.
Me when the show has SO MUCH POTENTIAL to be SO GOOD but the writers are just so fucking terrible-
Miraculous Ladybug (at this point the show is a joke and it kills me that it could've been a lot more than what it is)
Voltron (imagine killing all your characters both metaphorically and physically and the only characters you didn't kill are characters who were hardly even characters in the first place)
Star vs the Forces of Evil (sigh... no comment.)
Glee (as much as this show is... certainly a show and everyone loves to shit on it you can't deny that the idea itself COULD have been actually good)
Stranger Things (needs a whole essay by itself cause... yikes)
I'm going to preface this essay by saying, I have not read any of the books except for screenshots from people who actually have them, so this essay is strictly going to be about the show and maybe like... five book pages idk-
Spoilers, duh. But the essay is better if you haven't watched the show, but don't read it if you're ever planning to. This is like majorly important plot spoilers.
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Old Man McGucket. The crazy old guy who actually turns out to have a hell of a lot of plot relevance in a crazy twist that was foreshadowed in a way that people generally overlooked as "crazy shenanigans from the crazy shenanigans show". Wait a minute...
(vine boom goes here)
Yeah, McGucket and Simon are pretty similar for multiple reasons. But we're not here to talk about that. We're here to talk about the incredibly dark reality of Old Man McGucket. A man who didn't lose his mind, but instead, locked it away himself.
THE SHOW:
We are introduced to McGucket in the second episode of the first season, The Legend of the Gobblewonker. Grunkle Stan drags Dipper and Mabel to go fishing with him, as they're there, they see this crazy old man screaming about something called a "Gobblewonker" a strange Loch Ness Monster type creature that hides out on a mysterious island off the shore. Everyone calls him crazy, but Dipper and Mabel decide to go hunt down this Gobblewonker and take a picture of it to win a photo contest, ditching Grunkle Stan in the process. Eventually they learn that the "Gobblewonker" isn't actually real, but instead a robot made by the crazy old guy at the start in order to get attention from his son. This crazy old guy is Old Man McGucket.
Immediately from this first episode intro we learn a couple of things about Old Man McGucket. He has a son, who is never mentioned ever again in the show. His wife left him. He has a knack for machinery. He's generally viewed as crazy by the characters, and, let's be honest... he is. Now immediately you have a couple of questions. Why is this crazy old guy a robot genius? He doesn't seem like a mad scientist type, more like a hillbilly. So what's up with that? Good question. Keep that in your pocket for now.
For the rest of the season McGucket never really shows up in any prominent roles. He's really just a crazy old hillbilly prospector-y guy who just so happens to be pretty good with machines. It's not really questioned. It is brought up multiple times, but otherwise ignored. So, whatever. Crazy shenanigans from the crazy shenanigans show, right? Well not this crazy shenanigans show, because, ultimately, Gravity Falls is made for theorists and mystery solvers. Encoded messages. Hidden clues. Itty bitty details that all allude to the bigger picture. The solution to the question... what is going on in Gravity Falls? That and who wrote The Journals, but that's not the point.
The point is that the Gravity Falls fandom is full of people who look into every little detail to solve mysteries. So McGucket being good with machines? No way that's just a crazy shenanigan.
So, what do we know about the author of the journals? He had six fingers. He was good with machines. He's probably been in Gravity Falls for a while. And Journal 3 is his last journal he was writing before he mysteriously... stopped.
McGucket fits two of those. Good with machines and lived in Gravity Falls for a while. But... we can reasonably make him fit the other two. Six fingers? His right arm is in a cast. Maybe he used to have six fingers, maybe something happened. Writing mysteriously stopped? McGucket is repeatedly shown to be basically insane so... maybe that's why he stopped writing the journals. Because something so horrific and terrible happened to him that he lost his mind, and so he stopped writing. That's it. All the signs point to-
Oh. Nevermind then.
Now that the theory is no longer that McGucket is the author of the journals, and instead it's Stan's secret twin brother... then who is McGucket?
For that... we need to look at season 2.
Specifically the episodes 2, 4, and 7.
Season 2, episode 2, Into the Bunker is partially an episode about Dipper's crush on Wendy and partially a lore episode. Dipper, Mabel, Soos, and Wendy head on an adventure to find the author of the journals's secret hideout, which is apparently in a tree. They find it and make it in. While down there they find a shapeshifting monster that tries to kill them and steal Journal 3. They escape, trapping the monster in a cryochamber and immediately leaving the secret hideout. On the way out, Soos managed to grab what he thought was a briefcase. As it turns out, the "briefcase" was, in fact, an only slightly wrecked laptop with the words "Property of F" written at the top. Soos says he can fix it and that's the episode. (Minus Wendy and Dipper stuff)
Season 2, episode 4, Sock Opera. Soos has finally fixed the laptop so now all Dipper and Mabel need to do is open it and they'll figure it all out. The author of the journals, the secrets of Gravity Falls, all of it at the click of a button! Exceepptt the laptop is unfortunately password locked. An eight letter word is between them and... essentially, everything the show has built up toward. Mabel gets distracted making a sock opera to impress a boy, and in an act of desperation, Dipper makes a deal with Bill Cipher, the main antagonist of the entire show, for a vessel in exchange for the password to the laptop. Bill takes over Dipper's body and immediately smashes the laptop thereby destroying any chance of opening it and we never find out the password. Bill is defeated in the end, but the laptop is destroyed and they're no closer to finding the author of the journals than before. Or are they? (Vsauce music starts)
Season 2. Episode 7. Society of the Blind Eye. We open on Lazy Susan closing up the diner. We see her kick out some rats, and Old Man McGucket from underneath a table, then on her way out she sees the gnomes from episode one stealing her pie. She's shocked, startled, bamboozled, but before she can really react a bunch of people wearing red coats just... take her away. Then the opening plays.
We're back to Mabel and Dipper trying to find the author of the journals, and upon closer inspection of the destroyed laptop that supposedly belonged to the author, they see a branding thing on it. This little piece of metal that says "McGucket Labs" so they piece together that McGucket could be the author of the journals. His first name is Fiddleford (I think this is the first time we learn that in the show), and the laptop says "Property of F", and all the evidence adds up. Of course, most of the fandom by now has moved on from the McGucket theory. So there's no way that's all there is to this episode. Of course not. That'd be incredibly stupid and a huge waste of time covering this episode.
So Mabel and Dipper go running to find McGucket. They find him with his house being vandalized by teens writing the words "Mc Suck-it" and McGucket promptly shooing them off his property. Dipper tells McGucket to drop the act and that he knows who he is, but McGucket says he hardly remembers anything. So they got to the last place he can recall in his memory which is the museum.
At the museum they discover a secret passageway which leads them to a secret meeting between a bunch of people in red robes. They all watch as the robed men erase Lazy Susan's memory of the gnomes with some weird looking ray gun. They conclude that the weird robed guys are the reason McGucket can't remember anything. That they did something to him to make him the way he is. So they resolve to find McGucket's memories and bring them back so he can remember everything.
After fighting the Blind Eye Society and then erasing all their memories of the society ever existing, they finally go to watch McGucket's memories and figure out everything that happened. And this... is where everything is revealed.
They play the memories, and we see a young man on screen. He's wearing glasses, a blazer and tie, and looks to be of good health and sound mind. He introduces himself as Fiddleford Hadron McGucket. He explains that he, for the past year, has been helping this scientist, the author of the journals, build some kind of... machine. But... something went wrong. Something terrible. So terrible that it haunts McGucket every day. So he invented something. Something to erase this terrible memory of what he helped build. The ray gun that the Blind Eye Society used. The very first thing he erases from his mind is erased right in front of us. He erases... "Fiddleford". The very first thing McGucket took away from his own brain... is himself.
We watch him come up with the Society of the Blind Eye. A society made to help people forget the terrible things they've seen. To help everyone live in blissful ignorance of what's really going on in Gravity Falls. The zombies. The gnomes. Everything.
We watch as McGucket erases more of his memories. We watch him get older, we watch his hair grey, we watch his beard grow, his glasses break and eventually disappear. We watch as he starts to forget words, talk faster. We watch him progressively lose his mind more and more. We watch him erase his own memories... to the point of no return. No one did this to McGucket. He did this to himself.
But... what happened to drive him to such drastic measures? What made him become so paranoid and so scared that he locked his memories away in hopes of never thinking about it again? What did McGucket see?
For that... we need to go back. Way back.
FIDDLEFORD HADRON MCGUCKET:
Fiddleford McGucket. Grew up on a hog farm in Tennessee with, well, not exactly what you call a lot of money.
He was, however, skilled in mechanics, and was pretty smart, which got him into Backupsmore University in the mid-1970s where he met Stanford Pines. The author of the journals and the twin brother of Stanley Pines. After he graduated he made his own computer business called "Fiddleford Computermajigs" but in the middle of his work he received a call from Ford saying he needed a mechanical genius to help him build a transuniversal poly-dimensional metavortex in his basement in Gravity Falls, Oregon. Fiddleford agrees, leaving his wife and son behind.
From then on, Fiddleford was Ford's research assistant. He helped Ford with all of his studies and any machine building needs, and even was so nice as to get him a Christmas present, yet forgot to get one for his actual wife. By the way, the password to his laptop, the one found in the bunker, was "Stanford" which is certainly a choice. But we're not here to talk about doomed old man yaoi, back to the normal conversation.
So, while Fiddleford was working with Ford, a Gremloblin, half goblin, half gremlin, attacks Fiddleford staring him right in the eyes which makes him see his worst nightmare. We don't actually know what Fiddleford saw in the Gremloblin's eyes. But we do know how it affected him. In the physical copy of Journal 3 we learn more. Stanford writes that he's been worried about Fiddleford since his encounter with the Gremloblin, saying that he hasn't slept or even fixed his Rubik's Cube since then. He tells Fiddleford to "use his creativity to solve his problems" intending to talk about meditation and such, but as we know... Fiddleford didn't quite take it like that. He used his creativity alright. He used it to build the mind eraser gun. Soon enough Fiddleford started to rely on the gun for everything. Every bad memory, every painful experience, everything he just didn't want to think about anymore. It worked like a drug, and boy, was Fiddleford an addict.
When Ford confronted him, Fiddleford, instead of dealing with his problems, simply erased Ford's memory of the gun entirely so he could use it freely without Ford knowing. Ford, of course, already wrote about the gun in the journal, so while he forgot about it, it was written down so he knew it existed. It's also implied that Fiddleford used the gun multiple times on Ford.
Nonetheless construction continues on the transuniversal poly-dimensional metavortex. During a test run where they sent a dummy into the metavotrex, Fiddleford's leg got caught on the rope and he was therefore dragged through the metavortex, seeing the other side briefly before Ford saved him.
Once he emerged, Ford asked what he saw and Fiddleford immediately told Ford that the portal was in fact dangerous and he never should've built it in the first place. He said it would bring about the end of the world and to "fear the beast with just one eye"
What? This guy? He's a floating dorito chip, I'm sure he's harmless...
(He's wanted in the entire multiverse.)
So, Fiddleford quits the project saying he'd "just as soon forget" and so... he erased his mind of what he saw on the other side of the portal. And he started... the society of the blind eye. In Journal 3, Ford writes about how he's had weird dreams of Fiddleford looming in the dark with a red robe on, and he wonders if they were really just dreams. Fiddleford has probably erased a lot from Ford's mind and plenty of the townsfolk, but to no degree near what he's erased from his own mind.
It only got worse. And worse. And worse. Until he, of course, became the Old Man McGucket we see at the start of the show. Of course, he still retains just a little bit of his former identity, before he became what he is. This shows in his skill with mechanical engineering, and also his knowledge of things like the Gobblewonker. Even in this... state, he can't ever truly forget everything he's tried so hard to.
Fiddleford went through a great trauma that left him mentally unwell, and how did he cope? By shoving it all into a high security prison in the corner of his mind where he never had to think about any of it ever again. This of course is a terrible coping mechanism because, none of it is actually ever gone... it's just hidden from view. And it'll never be fully gone of course, but shoving it away only makes it worse, like prisoners working out and getting super buff in prison.
All of this damaged McGucket's brain so badly that the memory gun couldn't even be used on him anymore. That's how bad it got.
In The Book Of Bill, Bill actually talks about an attempt to possess Fiddleford. And this... is what urged me to write this essay. Bill Cipher, the person who literally laughs at pain, like literally laughs, he enjoys it, went into Fiddleford's mind and he says that he's never been in a mind so damaged, so broken, so shattered beyond repair, that it actually hurt. And, in his words, "for the first time, I felt a pain that wasn't funny."
Bill Cipher, the guy who finds great pleasure in being a manipulative asshole and TORTURING PEOPLE, said this. The unimaginable pain and suffering McGucket must be going through, the torture that was inflicted on him as well as the torture he inflicted upon himself... it was so bad, that not even Bill Cipher could laugh. What was originally just a crazy old guy with possible ties to the Author... turned out to be a deeply damaged and traumatized man.
This is the most tragic character in Gravity Falls. I don't even know how to end this essay... I can't even make a joke.
I really need to finish reading Hitchiker's Guide because it's melting my brain with thoughts of it and yet I still haven't picked the book up in days.
i might babble a bit too much but i can NOT get over this performance. well the entire tour itself, but the iconic 1989 tour in 2014-2015. honestly this WAS her best vocal tour recorded. not eras, not reputation, not speak now, not red, and not fearless, but 1989 honestly will always be my favorite vocal concert of taylor’s. her voice was so young but so STRONG at the same time, and sadly she did hurt her vocals to make such rough notes while she sang at this concert but like
this just proves WHY people call her the music industry. she was only 26, and she was singing CRAZY vocals, and with only FIVE albums released. either way, she had been making records SINCE 2007 when she released debut. literally 2009 and she’s selling out STADIUMS for her second album, and she was TWENTY. insane, it will always blow my mind. but let’s focus on 1989 rn
so 1989 era was really a handful, since during it she went through her ED, and she was JUST beginning to release her pop music, like 1989 was her first pop album after doing mostly country for 8 years. but the concert oh my GOD i would’ve died if i could’ve gone…my cousin went she calls it a fuckin’ fever dream dude 😭, like yes, movie/documentary is VERY badly edited and all but like
the VOCALS people, the VOCALS.
take example one of her most iconic performances till this fucking day
like wow, it never fails to actually shock me to how good she sounds. this was the best bridge before any of her newer albums came out, but the way she sings so loud and so powerful is just like chilling everytime i listen to it
i could write an essay based on this fucking performance SOLEY, THATS how good it is. not a lot of singers are labeled; “THE music industry” at the age of 26. and since then, she’s maintained that title with other amazing albums…she recorded NINE albums in FIVE years while touring and filming TWO documentaries. that is WHAT the music industry does. but 1989 era oh my god what a time that was
don’t even get me started on reputation and eras tour like those
they literally
like.
wow.
mind boggling.
but yeah she’s my favorite artist for a reason lmao 😭
Oh wow, the character limit is like my biggest enemy rn, but I just need confirmation. Listen, I need you to read the two essays I wrote and tell me if they're good enough for me to make a commentary channel on yt or if I should stick to keeping my essays here or to myself. It's just that I have so many things I wanna talk about and so many ideas and stuff so I was thinking of doing one of those commentary channel things that mostly focuses on fandom content and fandom spaces yk- but idk if I'm that good at wording my essays. Obviously they would be better if I didn't have the character limit restrictions but just as they stand now are they good or absolute shit.
I wanted to do a wlw ship for part 3 of the "its gay" series but I'm struggling so hard with finding a good one because
1. I have to know and like the ship
2. It can't be canon because that's not what I'm here to talk about
3. It has to have something to it that I can write a full essay about
Finding an mlm ship like that is so easy. I can do it right now. Johnlock, Hilson, Hannigraham, Spirk, Wrightworth, Riddlebird(Gotham). I could do this in my sleep.
But finding a wlw ship like that is like finding a needle in a haystack except it's a really small haystack and also there are no needles in it. Every mainstream wlw ship is either canon or I don't know or like it. And if I do happen to find one that isn't canon and I do like it it's hardly anything worth a full essay.
I could talk about Morgwen but I've already discussed a BBC Merlin ship yk. I think I might just give up looking and cover Johnlock like I originally planned.
Just the difference in the frequency between mainstream mlm ships and mainstream wlw ships. There are significantly more mlm ships and they are always significantly more popular than wlw ships. Good job, everyone, misogyny at it's finest.
BBC seems to have a track record of taking existing IPs and making them uh... suddenly a lot... gayer. Sherlock and Merlin, like, jeez guys, wtf. (BBC Sherlock might be covered in part 3 maybe)
Merlin was released in 2008, ending in 2012 with one of the most devastating finales ever to exist. More devastating than Supernatural (spn fans don't come at me).
It's especially devastating with the most popular ship of the show. It's actually so queercoded it's crazy. (PS, been a while since I've watched the show so my memory may be fuzzy)
Merthur:
Let's talk about Merthur. The slash ship between Merlin and Arthur Pendragon.
At the start of the show, Merlin, a young sorcerer, is sent to the kingdom of Camelot by his mother. There he meets Arthur Pendragon, prince of Camelot, heir to the throne, and supreme asshole, being a dick to someone. Merlin jumps in to stop this and tells Arthur that's enough, but Arthur is just like "Do I know you?" And so Merlin is like "you're right, you don't, I wouldn't associate with an asshole like you" and uh... well Arthur replies with... the single gayest thing he could've said... ever.
Okay, calm down, sir.
Obviously that isn't what he meant, but I mean... like, come on- just this entire interaction because Merlin replies that he wouldn't wanna do that and Arthur says why, and Merlin says "you have no idea what I'm gonna do to you" and GUYS CAN WE STOP BEING GAY FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS
Not to mention that they're, what, INCHES away from each other. Guys now is NOT the time.
Anyway, Merlin tries to punch Arthur and is very easily taken down and sent to the dungeon for trying to punch the future king of Camelot. Gaius, the court physician and also the person Merlin is staying with while he's in Camelot, gets him out of there.
He meets Guinevere, the maid of Lady Morgana, the king's ward, and she tells him that standing up to Arthur was brave, but it's a good thing they didn't fight because he would've lost, Merlin says he could've totally beat up Arthur and she says "you don't look like one of those big muscle-y men" HA HA SHE CALLED HIM A TWINK. Keep Guinevere in mind. Gwen.
Anyway, magic is illegal in Camelot, so Merlin's sorcerer stuff needs to be kept under wraps. Magic is totally not an allegory for anything else at all.
Merlin and Arthur meet again, and they're back to being very gay. Arthur aks how Merlin's "knee-walking" is coming along and says he could "take you apart in one blow" and Merlin replies "I could take you apart with less than that" okay, guys, there are children present. You might wanna tone it down a little.
I know they're technically arguing here, but... this entire scene should just have a gay flag overlay because seriously wtf is this. You just... have to watch it. It's so gay it almost hurts. It is actually gayer than gay sex.
So anyway later on Merlin goes into a cave under the castle where the last dragon alive is being held and he talks to this dragon who tells him that he's destined to be Arthur's boyfriend- I mean destined to help Arthur save the kingdom. Yeah. There we go. The dragon specifically says that Arthur is "the once and future king who will save Albion." Merlin is upset at this and is like "nuh uh, that guy's a dick, you're a lying ass dragon" so the dragon peaces out, explaining absolutely nothing to Merlin, or the audience, as he calls out after it. Fun.
Anyway fancy dinner party time, Lady Morgana enters and all eyes turn to look at her. Merlin too and though he seems to think she looks good and even compliments her, it's not exactly too big of a reaction in contrast to Arthur's reaction. Though we can assume "well that's just Arthur" in light of how the scene plays out, Merlin's reaction seems a little tame. (Gay ass mf)
At the fancy dinner party some lady tries to assassinate Arthur and Merlin saves his life. Because of this, Uther, Arthur’s father, tells Merlin he must be rewarded for this. How does he reward Merlin? By making him Arthur's manservant, of course! Yay episode one over!
So now Merlin is Arthur's manservant and in this like knight battle thingy he has to help Arthur get into his armor before the battle and clean his armor after it. Merlin was at first annoyed at being ordered around by Arthur, but eventually we see him smiling and even talking to Arthur like his friend. Arthur obviously replies to all this with more orders for Merlin because he's still Arthur. The point is, Merlin is warming up to the situation he's in.
He finds out about ANOTHER plot to kill Arthur in the battle thing. So he's set on stopping it. This guy is bringing the snakes drawn on his shield to life so they can bite and kill Arthur in the final battle. Before he can do this, Merlin finds out and cuts one of the snakes' head off taking it to Arthur as proof.
Arthur doesn't believe him at first but Merlin says "I know I'm just a servant and my word doesn't matter but I would never lie to you" Arthur tells him to swear it and so Merlin does and Arthur believes him.
So they go in front of the king to accuse this guy of using magic but little do they know he actually knows they know so he killed the only credible witness to the snakes meaning the accusation had no legs to stand on other than a snake head. This makes Arthur look like he's trying to get out of the battle with this guy, basically he looks like a coward.
So he gets mad at Merlin, saying he trusted him and that he's sacking Merlin for a servant he can actually trust. Their first break up. 😔
Merlin goes to the dragon like "bitch, now I know you're a lying ass dragon, there's no way it's my destiny to protect this guy, he hates me." Then the dragon is like "a half cannot truly hate that which makes it whole" wow, describing Merlin and Arthur as two halves of the same whole. That's hetero. Okay well, arguably, it could be hetero in the sense that I could say that abt my best friend, but just the dragon like "you and Arthur’s paths lie together" I mean... come on.
Anyway Merlin goes ahead and saves Arthur’s life for the second time. Get used to this. Arthur then tells Merlin he made a mistake by firing him and that he wants him back as his manservant. Arthur doesn't know Merlin saved him btw cause he saved him with magic and magic is illegal. Regardless, Arthur here, though he admits to being wrong, doesn't really say sorry. Most likely because he's emotionally constipated, a nice gift from his father.
I think you get the point by now. Over the course of the episodes we see Merlin and Arthur grow closer. Merlin repeatedly saving Arthur, sometimes even at the risk of his own life and Arthur becoming less of a prat. Also... so... so much eye sex. Like... an unbelievable amount of eye sex...
Btw Guinivere is implied to have a crush on Merlin at the start of the show, with the way she acts around him and such. Merlin however is more casual when it comes to their interactions. He's not flirting or anything he's just being Merlin. (Gay ass mf.)
In one episode Merlin falls deathly ill. Guinevere and Arthur are extremely worried and the only antidote is in a very dangerous cave and so Arthur is like "I volunteer as tribute!" But his dad is like "no way, you're the prince, you're not risking your life for a mere SERVANT." And Arthur is just like "uhm, actually, I think I will" so he goes to the cave anyway, and Merlin EVEN IN HIS COMATOSE STATE SENSES THAT ARTHUR NEEDS HIS HELP so he summons a glowing orb to light Arthur's way through the cave. So Arthur gets the antidote and gets it back to Gaius and leaves, probably to get an earful from his dad. Merlin wakes up to Gwen and Gaius and Gwen immediately kisses him because she's just so relieved he's alive. She apologizes and Merlin says "it's okay" then immediately after this episode the Merlin/Guinevere storyline is dropped. (Wow, Merlin, pretty gay of you)
Let's recap, after however many times Merlin has risked his own life to save Arthur’s, Arthur is now RISKING HIS LIFE FOR MERLIN'S. He's also shown to be one of the people who are MOST worried about Merlin, and this cast of characters includes, Gwen who's implied to be crushing on Merlin and Gaius who's literally his caretaker and is like a parent to him. And Merlin and Arthur’s souls are SO intertwined that even WHILE COMATOSE they can sense when the other is in danger.
Arthur also isn't there to watch Merlin wake up and doesn't even tell Merlin that he's the one who saved his life. What an emotionally constipated bitch. But you see at the start of the show Arthur would never and I mean NEVER have risked his own life for a servant's. And this positive change in Arthur is BECAUSE OF MERLIN.
Now that the Merlin/Guinevere has been dropped, we move along to Arthur/Guinevere. So Arthur and Guinevere talk and Guinevere gives Arthur a piece of her mind then quickly apologizes and Arthur’s like "no, it's fine, no one's ever talked to me like that" and... Arthur... MERLIN has talked to you like that. MULTIPLE TIMES. 🤨
The dragon repeatedly tells Merlin that he and Arthur are "two sides of the same coin" and other such prophetic stuff about how they're gay for each other.
Not only would either of them recklessly THROW THEMSELVES INTO DANGER for the other, but Merlin even made the CONSCIOUS DECISION to make sure Arthur NEVER LEGALIZES MAGIC THE ONE THING THAT HAS BEEN CAUSING MERLIN THE GREATEST AMOUNT OF SUFFERING OVER THE COURSE OF THE ENTIRE SHOW JUST FOR THE SAKE OF ARTHUR. HE WOULD THROW AWAY SOMETHING AS IMPORTANT AS THAT IF IT MEANT ARTHUR WAS SAFE.
When king Uther dies, in a later episode his ghost is summoned and he and Arthur talk. Uther runs his mouth about Gwen, Arthur’s literal actual wife, and Arthur is upset at this ofc, but when Uther so much as utters ONE WORD about MERLIN, Arthur is immediately like "now you done did it" and GETS RID OF HIS FUCKING GHOST. Not because he talked about Gwen or ANYONE ELSE FOR THAT MATTER. Because he talked about MERLIN.
I must clarify, I don't think this means Arthur doesn't love Gwen, because he does (bisexual ass mf), but is Gwen the one whose destiny is intertwined with his? Uh, I don't think so.
In an episode, Merlin is upset, and all he does is WALK INTO THE ROOM and Arthur is immediately like "what's wrong?" and trying to cheer him up.
In another episode, Merlin is in danger and Arthur WAKES UP IN A COLD SWEAT WITH HIS ACTUAL FUCKING WIFE (Gwen) NEXT TO HIM AND THE FIRST WORD OUT OF HIS MOUTH IS MERLIN'S NAME. AND THEN HE JUST FUCKING LEAVES TO GO FIND HIM.
When your husband wakes up from his sleep out of nowhere, saying his manservants name then immediately running out to go find him like you aren't even there: 🤨🏳️🌈?
By the way, once again with the SENSING WHEN THE OTHER IS IN DANGER. Like... come on.
Merlin has become less of a manservant for Arthur and more of one of the only people he can trust. His closest confidante. Someone he can rely on and he hopes can rely on him.
For Merlin, Arthur becomes less of a prat he's destined to protect and more of someone he cares about deeply and would go to any length to protect. Someone he would do anything for not because he has to, but because he just cares that much.
But through all of that there's still that one problem. That one thing they can't talk about, at least not normally. Because of certain laws.
Magic = Gay?:
In this world, magic was outlawed by king Uther because people were using magic for evil purposes (because magic killed his grandma, okay!) This caused the kingdom to be a little not okay. So basically a bunch of people with magic were trying to assassinate Arthur because of this law, because they don't want the law to continue so if the Pendragon bloodline ends hopefully the next king will be better and get rid of the rule.
Magic itself, in this world, is not something you can do unless you're born with it except for certain types like potions and stuff. But to do magic from your own two hands by yourself that you have to be born with. You don't get a say in it, you're just born with magic. And this magic isn't just something you have, no, it's a part of you. It's who you are. Merlin even says "if I can't use magic I might as well die". Magic is something personal to the user and with it being outlawed everyone with magic is forced to hide away a part of themselves. To lock it away and make sure no one sees such a dangerous disgusting side of who they are. But... magic, when used for the right reasons, isn't dangerous or disgusting at all. The actions of the few of magic users who did bad things created a punishment that affected all magic users. That forced them to live their lives agreeing with others on how terrible magic is when, behind closed doors, they can make objects float and bring statues to life.
Lady Morgana, remember her? She has magic. At the start of the show she didn't actually know she had it, but she does. We're shown her repeatedly talking to Gwen about men and mostly men. But the way she talks about it is surface level and superficial like a teenager with a boyfriend that'll last for a week before he's dumped. Meanwhile it seems as though she cares about Gwen herself deeper than that, than those superficial feelings she talks about.
Merlin is shown to not really have a lot of interest in women despite the kiss with Gwen and one scene with Morgana, but even then he's pretty... tame about it. He rarely has any sort of love interest type scenes with women. In fact half the men who get introduced in the show that Merlin becomes close with seem more like love interests than the women.
All of this seems a little... familiar. That's right, folks. Magic is an allegory for being gay. Lady Morgana is a lesbian (another win for the sapphics)!
And this is the one thing that Merlin can't tell Arthur about. The one thing he has to keep from him. Because if Arthur knew what Merlin was... well... who knows. He can never tell him the truth. Unless he's forced to.
The Finale:
I would explain the entire episode but it's just not important to the point of this. (Well I mean maybe kind of but...... okay it's complicated and like- just, I'm not gonna get into it) So let's get right into the important part. The ending.
Arthur is dying. And if Merlin doesn't get him to a very specific place very fast... Arthur isn't going to make it. So Merlin is determined to get it done no matter what. He carries the dying Arthur around on a horse all day. On the way the encounter a couple of fuckers who like hate the kingdom or something or other it is actually really not important uhm Lady Morgana is evil btw. So Merlin is forced to hide the fact that Arthur is a knight of Camelot, and also the fucking king. But the fuckers actually find out and they're about to attack them when Merlin uses magic to stop them. In front of Arthur. For the first time. After all this time. Arthur finally knows the truth. And in this scene Arthur isn't mad because Merlin has magic. He's mad because Merlin lied to him.
In Arthur's eyes this was a betrayal. The person he thought he could trust more than anyone else, the person he considered to be someone he could always rely on to tell the truth... has kept something so big from him all these years. Arthur isn't mad because Merlin has magic. That's not the part he's mad about. It's that Merlin didn't tell him.
They continue and encounter more fuckers along the way which they expertly avoid thanks to Merlin's magic and Arthur being the observant fellow he is recognizes that this isn't the first time Merlin's had to cover for Arthur.
When Arthur mentions this and mentions the fact that he never tried to take credit for what he did, covering Arthur's ass every time he did something stupid or someone tried to kill him, Merlin says that's not why he does it. He doesn't stick his neck out for Arthur for fame or glory. He did it for Arthur. Sure, you can reasonably make the argument that he did it cause he's a good person or cause it was his destiny, but the way he looks at Arthur in this scene and the way Arthur reacts. It's clearly not the intended meaning. What Merlin is saying here is "I did it all for you. Because I care about you and I don't want to see you hurt or worse, dead."
When night falls, Merlin and Arthur stop to rest.
Merlin tends to Arthur, giving hin water, trying to keep him alive as long as possible. Arthur starts speaking, saying "whatever happens-" before he's cut off by Merlin telling him not to speak. Arthur tells Merlin that he's the king and Merlin can't order him around, but Merlin says it's never stopped him before so why should he change now. Arthur replies to this with "I don't want you to change. I want you to always be you. I'm sorry about how I treated you." Arthur then falls asleep and Merlin tells him to get some rest, not replying to what Arthur just said but it's evident in his face that it affected him. This scene is also sponsored by too much eye sex to be hetero. (If you think I'm joking about how much eye sex they have... I wish I was)
Later they're just barely at their destination but Arthur is dying faster than Merlin can get him to where they're going, especially since the horses ran off.
So now Merlin is desperately trying to save Arthur and he's just in complete denial about the whole situation, trying to convince himself there's a way they can still make it, but Arthur just shuts him down. He tells him to stop and "just... hold me... please." This is Arthur’s only request as he's dying. For Merlin to just... hold him. Just... be there. That's all he wants.
He tells Merlin that he wants to say something to him before he dies. Especially now that he knows everything Merlin's done for him. He wants to say something he's never said to him before. "Thank you." And those are his last words as he finally dies and Merlin cries over him.
Except... wait. Arthur has said "thank you" to Merlin before. Maybe not often... but he said it. There are even compilations of it. Maybe the creators just forgot. Or...
Maybe this scene wasn't meant to end with "thank you".
Maybe this scene was meant to end with something the creators weren't allowed to say.
Maybe... Arthur was supposed to say... "I love you."
His dying breath, his last words are to Merlin and Merlin alone. No one else. Just Merlin. It was always Merlin.
Merlin screams begging for Arthur to wake up, and obviously he doesn't so Merlin calls on the dragon for help. When the dragon arrives it just tells Merlin "Arthur is the once and future king" emphasis on the "once" part. Arthur was always going to die. It was destined. And we were told it from the beginning. Arthur would die then rise again to save Albion when they need him most, centuries later. Then the dragon flies off leaving Merlin to deal with his grief.
We see Gwen become the only ruler on the throne since Arthur is now dead. She legalizes magic btw and fixes the kingdom kind of, but that's not important to this essay. (Love Gwen so much actually)
We cut to a timeskip. Centuries in the future. Present (2012) day. We see Merlin. He must've used magic to stay alive all these years. All these years. He stayed alive and waited. Waited for King Arthur to return. And he still waits. No matter how long it takes. For Arthur. The once and future king.
I'm starting a series. You're all gonna have to deal with this until I get bored of it.
If it looks like a duck
And quacks like a duck
It's gay! (Part 1):
Klance (Voltron: Legendary Defender)
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Ah, Voltron. The show that ruined lives, friendships, and cause a giant mob of people to start sending death threats to innocent people who worked on the show all because they didn't smash two characters faces together. What a time.
I'm lucky enough to have not been a part of that uhm... unfortunate situation. You see, I am one of the sane fans of Voltron and I also didn't even have any social media at the time so even if I was angry, it's not like I even knew how to send a death threat.
But what's all the fuss about? Why's everyone so pissed cause their favs didn't share a passionate kiss in the series finale? Surely, the anger over such a simple thing is completely unjustified, right?
Yes, actually, sending death threats to artists and animators who had LITERALLY NOTHING to do with how the show was written, no, scratch that, sending death threats to ANYONE AT ALL is completely unjustified.
But minus the death threats, was the fandom justified in being pissed off at the way the relationship was handled? In my professional opinion... yes.
Klance:
Let's talk about Klance. The slash (mlm) ship between Keith Kogane and Lance McClain.
I could spend this time exploring the history of the characters all the way back to the 1984 show, but I already made a super long intro so I think we should just get right into the meat of things.
Voltron Legendary Defender. The first season of the show was released on June 10th 2016 and immediately from the first episode Kieth and Lance have an established relationship.
A not-so-friendly rivalry of sorts originally one-sided as Keith didn't even know Lance existed, until the two met and Keith, being competitive and hot-headed, immediately started arguing back and forth with Lance, turning it into a mutual rivalry.
This rivalry is their main dynamic throughout most of the show. Lance annoys Keith, Keith and Lance argue.
Lance's dislike of Kieth is just very poorly concealed envy and insecurity, and Keith often tries to display himself as "above" the rivalry or Lance's childish behavior, but it's very clear that it only takes one annoying sentence from Lance for him to immediately stoop down to the same level.
Despite this however, Lance and Kieth are able to work together when it matters such as when it comes to forming Voltron and during some of the team building exercises in the second episode. Technically the fourth episode but the first three were three parts of the same episode.
Point is, gradually, the relationship between Keith and Lance became less of an angry tug-of-war and more of a kind of friendly but not really rivalry with them trying to one-up each other and exchanging banter a lot.
They are also often depicted together in the same shot, sitting next to each other, or even just standing near one another. They're portrayed as a sort of pair. Evident in their contrasting signature colors, blue and red, and their contrasting personalities, with Keith being more serious, hot-headed, and broody and Lance being more of a comedian, easy-going, flirtatious type.
A really big moment in their relationship happens early on in the show when the castle-ship is being attacked by Sendak, one of the antagonists. During the battle against Sendak, Lance is badly injured and is rendered incapacitated due to his injuries. But in a crucial moment, Lance wakes up and shoots Sendak's arm off, saving Kieth, and being an important factor in finally ending the battle. Kieth runs to Lance's side to check on him and Lance says "we did it... we are a good team..." giving a soft smile, which Keith returns.
In the next episode, we see Lance in a healing pod and Keith, in specific, being anxious for his recovery, more so than any of the other paladins, not even the ones who've been friends with Lance for way longer. Once Lance is out, though, he goes right back to bickering with Keith who says he thought they "had a bonding moment" and were past arguing, Lance denies knowing anything about any "bonding moment".
Later on in the episode, the Blue Lion is stolen by a female alien named Nyma who Lance was flirting with. She steals the Blue Lion by convincing Lance to give her a ride in it specifically by mentioning Keith, which makes Lance jealous so he immediately agrees which gets him chained to a tree. Keith gets it back, communicating to Lance that they got the Blue Lion. Lance then asks if Keith can come unchain him from the tree he's trapped on and Keith pretends that Lance is cutting out (there's more to this scene but that'll be covered in a different section of this essay) because of this Lance says "Oh, come on, I thought we bonded!" Showing he does very much remember the bonding moment and only pretended to not remember. (Because he didn't wanna think about it/deal with it at the time. He's literally me.)
Keith and Lance continue to be repeatedly shown as being the antithesis to each other. When they work together on a mission, Keith is shown to be talented but impulsive, making a plan that isn't really all that much of a plan and so Lance stops him and gives him a better plan, showing how Lance is less impulsive, and more strategic. Keith is also shown to always state his opinion bluntly, even if it's controversial and he never tries to really hide his thoughts or put up a front, unlike Lance who is almost always putting on some kind of performance in order to hide his true thoughts and emotions, to hide away his insecurities from people.
The next important moment happens in season two episode five. Keith and Lance are tired from a battle so they both just so happen to independently decide to head to the pool, and when they meet at the elevator going there, they're very displeased to see each other. Keith then says "Look. You stay on one side of the pool, and I'll stay on the other, and we'll be far far away from each other. Very. Far. Away." (Two bros chilling in a hot tub five feet apart cause they're not gay) unfortunately though, the elevator breaks down meaning Keith and Lance are forced to work together to get out. They climb up the elevator shaft... uh... wait idk how to explain this. They... they The Emperor's New Groove it, if you haven't watched that movie, then what are you even doing with your life. So they work together to get up until they realize that Altean pools are upside down anyway meaning they couldn't have swum in it if they wanted to.
In episode 6, Keith and Allura believe they're being tracked by Glara (the enemy) so they sneak out in an escape pod. When Lance hears about this he immediately assumes that Keith and Allura snuck out for other reasons. This makes him upset. When Keith and Allura return, Lance asks Keith if he's with Allura and Keith, naturally, says yes, to which Lance immediately says "like with her, with her or..?"
Lance is clearly jealous. Of Keith or of Allura? Good question. This is the same thing that happened in season one when the Blue Lion was stolen and the mere mention of Keith made Lance jealous. It's ambiguous who exactly he's jealous of. Now I know what you're saying "that's a bit of a stretch, isn't it?" And sure maybe it is, but it only gets worse.
Season 2 is more focused on Kieth finding out more about his past and coming to terms with it and it seems like Keith turning out to be half-galran doesn't really affect Keith and Lance's relationship as Lance doesn't treat him any differently after learning the news.
But in episode 10 when Lance is alone with a yupper he starts to describe his teammates. He seems excited when talking about each one, but when he gets to Keith he says "Keith is always doing things like flying into asteroid fields and black holes and cool junk like that" and in contrast to his excited manner of speaking about the rest of the paladins, when speaking about Keith he instead has a fond smile in his face. Hetero way to talk about your rival.
In the season 2 finale, Shiro, the team leader, goes missing. Keith is upset by this even blowing up at a team meeting over it. And this moment... when Keith is so visibly upset, the entire rest of the team all look to Lance to comfort him, and Lance, without even looking at the rest of the team or even knowing they're looking at him immediately walks up to comfort Keith. Despite all their bickering and their supposed "rivalrly" Lance is still the closest one to Keith minus Shiro. Lance is still the one to comfort him here. Lance still cares deeply about Keith.
Season 3, lovingly dubbed "the Klance season" by fans. With Shiro missing, the group was down one paladin, and their leader at that. So now the team have to decide on a new leader. Coran nominates Keith as the new leader and Lance immediately disagrees. Saying he wouldn't want Keith to lead him anywhere, Keith says he doesn't want that either, and that him being leader is just what Shiro wanted.
The Black Lion however picks Keith as it's new paladin. Meaning Keith would be leader. Keith however immediately rejects the idea, saying "I can't replace Shiro. You guys were right, I'm the loner, I'm not the leader Shiro thought I was." And once again Lance is the first one there to comfort him. He tells Keith that no one can replace Shiro, but the Black Lion chose Keith for a reason. It's because of this that Keith accepts his role as new team leader.
When Lance goes to try and pilot the Blue Lion, for some reason, it doesn't respond to him. Lance immediately takes this as meaning that he's not meant to be a paladin. He's upset but as soon as he voices this, the Red Lion roars. Lance becomes the new red paladin with Allura taking his place as blue paladin.
In episode 3, Keith impulsively leads the team into a dangerous situation not even stopping when the Blue Lion gets hit and Lance is the one who stops him, emphasizing that they're a team and have to stick together.
But, oopsie, the rest of team gets separated. Keith says it's his fault and he put them all in danger, ignoring them when they told him to stop, and Lance says "Yeah, you kinda did. But now we gotta fix it" he's not trying to convince Keith not to blame himself, because he is ultimately at fault, but he's stopping Keith from spiraling and basically saying "it's okay we can fix this" he's not saying YOU fix this. He's saying WE fix this. Him and Keith.
When Shiro gets back to the rest of the group, Lance goes to Keith's room to talk to him privately. Lance opens up to Keith saying that with Shiro back "that's one paladins too many" implying that he would be kicked off the team with Shiro piloting the Balck Lion, Keith piloting the Red Lion and Allura piloting the Blue Lion. This is the first time we ever see Lance being vulnerable with someone on screen. He's not putting on a performance or acting confident like he usually does. And this is all to Keith. Keith specifically. Keith catches on to what Lance is implying and tells him to "leave the math to Pidge" which seems to comfort Lance.
In season 4 Keith decides to leave Voltron in order to stay with the Blade of Marmora, a rebel group of Galran fighters against Zarkon, the same group his mother is part of. Lance in specific seems more shocked and hurt by this decision than anything else. The rest of the team is naturally upset but supportive, but none of them look hurt by the decision. Only Lance. Knowing Lance, this is most likely him blaming himself for Keith leaving. But naturally he just puts on a smile and even makes a joke asking who he's going to make fun of now that Keith is leaving.
Klance moments in the last few seasons are sparse but even then Lance and Keith are often portrayed as being closer to each other than anyone else with Lance opening up to Keith and Keith doing the same as they find mutual comfort in each other. Not even Allura, Lance's supposed love interest, gets the same level of vulnerability Lance has with Keith, and they each drive the other to be better, like a puzzle that just fits perfectly.
If not gay then why perfect antithesis to each other? If not gay then why only vulnerable with each other? If not gay then why always portrayed as a pair in basically every scene? I think you get it at this point. Keith and Lance are special to each other in a way no one else is. Still want more evidence? Okay.
Visuals:
Studio Mir is the animation studio that worked on Voltron, and just so happens to be the same studio that worked on Legend of Korra, a show with a canon wlw couple composed of two main characters. Studio Mir used certain visual cues to imply Korra's feelings for Asami before they were confirmed. Bisexual lighting in the background of scenes, facial expressions that were just a little too fond to be hetero. Naturally, Studio Mir applied the same principles in Voltron. All of this was run by the showrunners before getting approved btw. So, no, this isn't just Studio Mir doing whatever.
Anyway, expressions are THE most important thing in animation. The facial expression you give your character determines how they feel so naturally a lot of care and attention goes into perfecting that.
In the episode where the Blue Lion gets stolen by Nyma, Keith is shown to have been talking to Rolo, the guy who was accompanying Nyma. And according to his facial expression, a smirk on his face and his eyes following Rolo, it seemed like Keith was... what's that? Flirting with Rolo! Gasp! Could he be... g-g-g-g-gayyy!!!
There's more in this episode. In scenes with Lance, and specifically with Lance, the background uses the same bisexual lighting utilized in LoK to imply Korrasami. This was obviously intentional because we've seen Studio Mir use these techniques before. They meant to imply Lance is bi.
It doesn't end there. When animating facial expressions the one to express a deep sense of fondness or more specifically, love, the inner ends of the eyebrows are raised and there should be a soft or small smile.
Exhibit A:
Exhibit B:
Exhibit C:
And so... so much more. Actually a whole mountain more. Hetero way to look at your rival.
And if you're looking for ideas for totally hetero scenes you can have with your rival, you could totally have a heart-to-heart in the sunset, the kind of lighting usually thought of as romantic, while you look at each other with a deep and soft fondness in your eyes offering a kind of comfort you can only get from each other and no one else.
Incredibly hetero, no gay here.
If you still need MORE proof... you're an idiot.
Moving along, you're probably asking "well, all of this seems fine and well, but none of this makes being angry over it justified? So what exactly is the deal here?" Let me tell you, dear reader. The deal here... is queerbait.
Queerbait:
Queerbaiting is when the writers of a show deliberately write a character to be heavily implied to be gay or queer in some way, luring a queer audience in with the idea of a canon queer character or relationship, but with no real intention of actually going through with it.
Klance and all the chemistry between the two characters wasn't accidental, wasn't just a little unimportant thing, it was completely intentional. The animation that the showrunners approved was intentional. The writing of scenes between the two and the way their relationship is portrayed is intentional. The forced proximity in climbing up the elevator shaft in that one episode is intentional.
Don't believe me? Before season 7 was released there was a sort of promotional QnA panel at I think a convention thing for it. During this panel, it was confirmed that there would be a canon queer character in season 7. And not a new side character, an existing one. Of the main cast. Naturally the fandom went crazy, I mean, a canonical queer character! That's great news! So everyone started speculating on who and the main suspects were obviously Lance and Keith with all the evidence suggesting they're bi and gay, respectively. Or if they were really cool they could have Pidge/Katie be canonically trans. It definitely drummed up a lot of hype for season 7.
So on the day of the season's release everyone was really excited to find out who would be the canon gay character! And... they give us one hardly a second long scene with Shiro looking at a plaque with the name of his dead fiance on it. Shiro isn't even that upset he just looks... mildly sad. Then it's pretty much not really brought up again in any significant way.
Sure, Shiro is canonically gay and that's cool and all and I'm glad there's a canon gay character, but... I mean, come on, you can do better. There wasn't even any sort of evidence or anything that implied Shiro was at all gay until this very moment as opposed to other characters that had a lot of clues and evidence and buildup to imply that they are queer.
Especially with the way they talked about it on the panel, like it was something big, like it was going to be crazy and important. Like it would blow us away. Only for... this. It can't help but feel so... intentional.
They knew their audience, and they knew the audience was predominantly made up of queer people. They knew that saying a character would be confirmed gay would only make the views on season 7 skyrocket. They never actually cared about queer representation. Only about how much money they can make off us.
Klance shippers aren't "delusional" and they're not seeing things that aren't there. All of this just confirms it. This entire time, all these seasons of soft fond glances, of intentional dialogue and lighting. It was all just one big lie. Just bait on a hook made to catch money.
So yeah. I think the anger over it is pretty justified. The anger over being tricked again and again. I tell you, I'm fucking sick of getting into a new show or franchise and thinking "finally, finally some queer rep" thinking that maybe just maybe this time it'll be different, it won't be like the other times. And then... it's exactly the same. Over and over. I think it's justified that queer people are angry over being screwed over time and time again by greedy showrunners. Maybe not death threats, but we at least have the right to be angry.
Klance could have been such a great and well-written queer romance that could've made Voltron such a better show especially considering the shitshow season 8 was, but no. No the writers are fucking cowards. (and also incredibly incompetent when it comes to writing Lance's character specifically, butchering his entire character and personality in favor of the hetero romance he has with Allura which pisses me off so fucking bad)
Oh well. I guess it's just something else that could've been... TIME TO READ SOME "FIX-IT"S ON AO3!
thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed reading it, I struggled to write this honestly, it took me weeks cause I had to like check facts, rewrite bits that felt off, proofread, etc etc. It's so tiring 🥲 so it's good that you liked it
I wish I was a youtuber just so I could film myself playing The Evil Within 2 so everyone can witness the greatness.
So this man is actively trying to kill the character you play as and he also kidnapped your daughter and killed multiple people meaning you actively have reason to hate him and he is a terrible person but... hear me out-
Is he maybe a psychopath? Yeah probably. But like... he's just mansplain manipulate manwhore-ing his way through life and there's nothing wrong with that. He killed people? God forbid he has hobbies, jeez, guys, calm down.
Anyway I bring this up cause this guy is, I'm sorry to say, AN ARTIST, and he likes to do photography. Specifically of people dying, but photography nonetheless. So in this one interaction there's some writing that appears on the wall that he wrote and it says... "smile for me" and my immediate first reaction, instead of the normal, sane reaction of, I'd assume, "fuck off", was "omg are you flirting with me 😊"
I must reiterate that this man is ACTIVELY attempting to assassinate us. He wants us DEAD. Immediately after you see the writing on the wall he literally sends these monsters to KILL YOU.
Honestly "smile for me" is most definitely a threat because it implies he's taking a picture of you and, as I've said, he likes taking a picture of the moment of people's deaths, but it's okay, he was totally flirting.
This is not an "I can fix him" situation btw, I absolutely CANT fix him, but honestly if he wasn't a psychopathic murderer I don't think I would like him.
I don't want him fixed. I want him majorly fucked up and fucking crazy.
If nothing else, I want to make the most unsettling, crazy, questionable yet so so intriguing kids show ever. The kind that you watched on TV when you were younger and because of how just so weird it was it just... sticks with you.
A show like Courage the Cowardly Dog.
If I die before I achieve this dream, someone better bring me back to life. Learn necromancy, discover some way to reverse time, just whatever you do, do not let me die without making a freaky ass show.
Alright, I just need to lie down in bed and hallucinate for a couple of minutes or maybe hours depending on my aura and general vibe/overall current energy level and then I'll come back to you with a maybe could be fire idea for a show.
(damn that's a shame. Don't even know how you would've gotten it to me in the first place honestly, I don't live in America idk if that's clear or like what)
(Oh, I don't live in America either. Now the thing is, how would've done it is that I switched my server on Amazon/any other online shop and IF you felt nice enough to give me your address[not here, somewhere else], I could change the adress on the online shopping app to that address, and you won't have to pay for it when you get it unless I choose a cash on delivery option :D)
Man me and my sisters watched this "guess the cartoon by theme song" thing and the fucking wave of nostalgia...
Anyway, here are some of my favorite nostalgic shows:
Rugrats (my sisters hate this one, and I'll tell you... I don't blame them.)
Rocket Power
Shaun the Sheep (one of the best shows ever, no question)
Mr Bean (one of the best shows ever as well)
Teen Titans (NOT GO. My Superhero Movie goes hard though, but that is ALL that I will give that stupid show)
Chalk Zone
Dexter's Labratory
Totally Spies
Kim Possible
Courage the Cowardly Dog
W.I.T.C.H.
Winx Club (ik this and WITCH are like rivals basically, but I think it's stupid to argue cause fundamentally they are two different shows each with their own strong and weak points so it's pointless to compare them (I always liked WITCH more))
Kick Buttowski
Inspector Gadget
Lazy Town
Danny Phantom
The Penguins of Madagascar
TMNT (2003-2006)
Monster High
Ever After High
Regular Show
Phineas and Ferb
Adventure Time
The Amazing World of Gumball
Uncle Grandpa (I used to be OBSESSED with this show. I was ALWAYS watching it)
BRO Teen Titans is so good, I loved that shit bro.
I don't remember the ending all that well, but I very vividly remember that one scene where Robin SINGLEHANDEDLY just beat up all the other Teen Titans and absolutely kicked their asses. There is a reason he is the leader of the Teen Titans. Like damn bro...
Is it obvious I had a crush on him as a child... it's not obvious, right?
Anyway that and the opening. Such a great opening, absolute banger, major vibe.
Her name is Raven and she was a cute child like- bro, she was so itty bitty and just... 😭
This just reminds me of how I have vague memories of TMNT but I very very VERY vividly remember Michaelangelo in the opening in his skateboard because I ACTIVELY did not care except for when Mikey was on screen. I keep making jokes about it like "lmao imagine being in love with an anthropomorphic turtle, couldn't be me." As a child I was honestly obsessed with Mikey.
Smile is the single worst horror movie I have seen in my life and I am so so incredibly fucking disappointed. For multiple reasons. Tw: suicide mention
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1. It is just not scary.
For all the people who walked out of the theatre terrified and going and making tik tok videos abt how "omg Smile was so scary I'm never gonna recover" I was expecting to be shaking in my boots, I was expecting to piss my pants, I was expecting to not even be able to get through the movie. And yet, 90% of the time was spent with a completely blank face. The other 10% was spent rolling my fucking eyes. The only time I was even MILDLY scared was in that one scene in the car with her sister, and that was just a cheap jumpscare.
There's no atmosphere in the movie, I'm not on the edge of my seat, I'm not watching at every moment for fear of something scary popping up. No. I genuinely did not give two shits actually. I was just waiting for the movie to just end. You can not cut this tension with a knife because there was none. Tension? More like tension headache. Cause that's what this movie gave me.
2. The story is stupid
Smile follows this lady who gets infected by this... virus? Bacteria? Fungus? No, yeah, it's never actually explained what exactly the Smile monster is, it just... is. She gets infected by watching someone who has the virus thing die, therefore transferring it to her. This virus causes her to have weird creepy hallucinations typically with a recurring theme of people smiling eerily.
These hallucinations cannot actually harm her, but they sure can harm her FUCKING CAT. So yeah. For all the "scary" shit going on on screen, the MC is actually completely perfectly safe, just incredibly paranoid and with gaps in her memory. She's also a danger to those around her. The MC is, effectively, the villain against her own will. She's also going fucking crazy.
So she finds out that there is no way to kill this thing and the only way to transfer it from one person to another is if the person who has the disease thing commits suicide and someone watches them do it. The person who watched it happen is now the one who is affected. So she's got this genius idea of "what if I just live all alone out in the middle of nowhere and not talk to anyone ever and just never kms then I've trapped the virus and when I die of old age instead of suicide, this thing dies with me." Which would be pretty smart... IF SHE ACTUALLY STUCK TO THE PLAN.
No. The end of the movie is her killing herself in front of someone. Good fucking job. 10/10. You fucking failed you stupid ass baby loser.
The idea in and of itself is not exactly super duper shit. It's the way it's shown in the story. The way it plays out.
The MC is never in any actual danger throughout the film.
You never really care about any of the other characters except for vaguely.
Unnecessary cat death. (I'm very fucking pissed about it I will never not be pissed)
They come up with a good plan to kill the monster at the end, and it would have at least ended the movie nicely if they stuck with the plan, but it's just the fact that she, in her big smart brain decided "what if I just... didn't do that."
The entire movie is just "ooh she's seeing creepy shit" yeah okay I see creepy shit all the time, she's not special.
Psychosis can be terrifying to the people experiencing it. But on the outside looking in, the person just looks crazy. With a monster that is essentially just severe psychosis... 🤷♀️
It's just kinda shit and the ending is the absolute shittiest part of it and it will never not piss me off because WHY THE FUCK DID SHE DO THAT SHIT IS SHE STUPID DID SOMEONE DROP HER AS A CHILD DID SHE GET BONKED ON THE HEAD WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ACTUALLY
3. No one in the movie is even mildly interesting
Our characters include:
One of the worst MCs ever made
Basic suburban mom
Boyfriend
White guy
...
No yeah that's pretty much all of them, and none of them even have super prominent roles except for MC and maybe White Guy, but he shows up like halfway into the film so who really gives a shit.
This movie is actually so uninteresting I was this close 🤏 to falling asleep while watching it.
If I had to describe Smile in one word?
Boring.
Bland.
Uninteresting.
Plain.
Annoying.
Headache.
Over-hyped.
Overrated.
Stupid.
Need I go on? I think you get the point by now that, in my opinion, punching myself in the face would be better entertainment than watching this movie.
ikr like literally relax you can do whatever you want forever as long as no one is getting hurt
Honestly I think my friends would like me less if I wasn't one the verge of losing my sanity. Who else would ask "who fucked a fish?" Upon seeing the fishmen in One Piece if not me?
Without my twisted mind to remind them that the entire world and universe and everyone they know and the past however many years could all just be a really vivid dream and they'll wake up in like 2012 the next morning, how would they ever survive?
Real friends are the ones that stick with you despite all the crazy shit you say and do. You can be you, no one's gonna pull out a gun and shoot you if you step out of line for one second.
see like it was my bestfriends birthday party, and i’ve known her for TEN years. like we have been THAT locked in…and she invited these 2 other girls, one that claimed to be her “best best best bestttt friend”, (the friend to isa,) and another girl who had a lot of issues with, but was also her friend
tell me why i asked isa if we wanna play just dance and she says: “yea ofc!” and the two other girls say: “oh that’s embarrassing” … ITS JUST DANCE HOLY SHIT??? but the entire time at the party me and her were just laughing cuz like, we DONT think what others think of us
lemme remind these hoes that i’m the only friend that sleeps over at her house and that her parents ACTUALLY like…
but yeah, i hate friends who put you down for being YOU
What? It is literally Just Dance, grown adults play Just Dance. What's wrong with Just Dance?
Imagine being so pissed at seeing someone else basically just existing. Not even doing anything to you. Like get actual help and mind your own damn business.
And to your own friends too like... treating your own friends like that. You must be fun at parties. Like wtf bro. Get help actually.
exactly!!! a lot of them were jealous of me. and it’s not to help my ego, it’s the TRUTH. i had a LOT of friends sabotage me to prevent me getting what i want-one of my closest friends stopped talking to me because i quote on quote “stole presidency from her”…i felt so sorry for her 😭.
and thank you!! i am fun, like in general when you get to know me as a person, i can be VERY helpful and a VERY good friend. what’s sad to say is that i always involve myself with the bad people, i only have about 2 real irl friends lol 😭😭😭😭. and i have TONS of “friends”. i mean, i had a friend group of 30 PEOPLE. it was insane. like i hate if i sound as if im glazing myself but i was really popular at my old school…
this new school im actually really liking my friend group!!! i have 2, kinda small but i still talk to a LOT of people. everybody is so nice like i love my friends, super non-toxic
Me when im looking for more ideas on an oc pinterest board and pinterest reccomends images of men who look exactly like the oc with women like NOOOOO HES SUPPOSED TO BE GAY 😔😔😔😔
I love how people are talking about Dipper's threat to Bill like "omg that's so scary" meanwhile Mabel is threatening to take this interdemensional demon of great unknown power and EAT HIM LIKE A DAMN NACHO CHIP
Like Dipper's threat is scary don't get me wrong
But Mabel is actually planning on grabbing Bill by his pussy, dipping him in fucking GUACAMOLE and straight up BITING HIS ENTIRE HEAD OFF
Like Dipper's threat is at least a normal "I'm gonna kill you" threat, Mabel's threat is "I am going to eat you alive"
I WANT THE BOOK OF BILL I WILL ACTUALLY KILL TO GET IT
EVERYTHING EVERY SINGLE GRAVITY FALLS RELATED PIECE OF MEDIA WAS RELEASED BEFORE I WAS EVER A FAN OF THE SHOW, BEFORE I EVER EVEN WATCHED A SINGLE EPISODE
I NEVER HAD THE CHANCE TO BE THERE AND TALK THEORIES AND LORE AND CHARACTERIZATION AND GEEK OUT OVER FINDING COOL STUFF IN THE BLACKLIGHT VERSION OF THE THIRD BOOK OR THE WACKY ADVENTURES COVERED IN THE COMICS
AND NOW IS MY ONLY CHANCE MY ONLY HOPE TO BE A FUCKING LOSER NERD THE WAY I WAS ALWAYS MEANT TO BE AND THE ONLY THING BETWEEN ME AND THAT REALITY IS A DAMN PAYWALL BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY THE BOOK ISNT FUCKING FREE AND I HAVE LITERALLY TWO DOLLARS
I COULD ASK FOR IT FOR MY BIRTHDAY BUT THATS TWO MONTHS AWAY TWO MONTHS THE CONVERSATION AROUND THE BOOK WONT BE THE SAME TWO MONTHS FROM NOW
I NEED THIS BOOK NOW I NEED IT BEFORE I ACTUALLY RIP MY OWN SKIN OFF MY BODY PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEA-
Mhm but I'm going to have to ask permission from my parents but we'll see more chances that they don't agree so please don't get your hopes up! Last thing I want is you being dissappointed :)
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I love how this is me everytime any sort of traumatic event happens to me: haha lol someone broke into my house while I was in the bathroom lmao, it's a good thing they didn't check in there, would hate for them to catch me with my pants down haha get it? Get it? I know I'm crying from pure terror, ignore that, is the joke funny or not?
The depression brings about whimsy because it's the only thing that keeps me from totally falling apart.
ARE YOU OKAY?? LIKE DID YOU MENTALLY CALM DOWN, DO YOUR PARENTS KNOW AND STUFF D:
urgh omw to give you a hug that's a terrifying situation.
it didn't actually happen. I don't think. Just my brain hearing noises outside and going "Yep that's someone here to kill you." It happens dw no one broke in
But I definitely did think someone did and I even texted my friend while crying 100% convinced I was gonna die. And I made that exact same joke. About getting caught with my pants down. I actually made multiple jokes. A concerning amount for someone who thought they were about to die.
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Lowkey I hate the fact that I had to verify my email again
Cus I use my mother's phone and her email storage was full so when I cleared all that itch just hit me with a "Hey girlie!☺️ You're not getting your account back."
SO I HAD TO MAKE A NEW ONE AND SPENT LIKE 1000+ HOURS LOOKING FOR THIS GROUP AGAIN FROM THE OLD COMMENTS ON MGM BECAUSE I DIDNT HAVE IT BOOKMARKED ON CHROME
PLUS I JUST CAME BACK RORM THE HOSPITALA
AHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHGGG I WANNA KMS AAAAA
Omg 😭😭😭
I'm so sorry, did you bookmark this place tho? So you don't have to do that again I mean
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Yeah I did this time I am NOT going through that again
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Uh
Is everyone ok.
Well take this art I'm making of beast!chuuya on rblx ig
I am not okay because school but that looks amazing!
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Dang school must suck for you then :(
BUt tyyyyy
It does fr I am suffering dude SUFFERING
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aur naur
(i started madoka magica :p)
KEWL
my biggest problem is just hw. I hate hw. I hardly have enough free time as it is.
HI DREAMING!!!!!
HIW HAVR YOU BEEN
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I HAVE BEEN SUFFERING IN THE HOSPITAL BUT OKAY IG!!1!!!11!!1
OH 😞 GLAD YOU'RE BETTER NOW
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Me when I just came back from the hospital and see almost everyone going insane(I lost my account):
HOSPITAL WTF HAPPENED ARE YOU OKAY
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Yeah, I'm fine(mostly) I had pneumonia ;-;
We're good though :P
I actually also came back to Twitter somehow after coming back from the hospital, and all I see on threads is that mii yeah! Thing and I'm Like--
"Wh... Is that..."
"..HATSUNE MIKU!?"
WHAT YOU TALK ABOUT PNEUMONIA LIKE "oh yeah it was nothing" BRO PNEUMONIA CAN BE FATAL (I say like that isn't literally the exact way I talked about that one time I almost died)
I am no on twitter so I have no clue 😁
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im fine reallyy it wasnt that bad
oh elon musk removed the like option so now everyone's using different versions of the MII "Yeah!" thing and i keep seeing the hatsune miku version..
So it was just like a mild case
oh wow, A-short Perfume really is just destroying twitter atp.
How's it going everypony?
I'm sure you can already tell, but I am not doing good! In fact, I'm doing very very shit rn! School is kicking my ass, the ACTs are kicking my ass, my entire life is kicking my fucking ass.
So, needless to say, I am this fucking close to losing my shit, but it's okay! I can always go find it later! Anyway, I need to go scream and cry into my pillow for the next hour.
Goodbye, everypony!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.
haiii guys :3…
It is really difficult to resist the urge to be mean sometimes.
Like the other day my class was in the gc talking about colors for our senior uniform next year (the seniors get a specialized uniform and other perks and such) and I was trying to push for a CMYK color pallette but my class pretty much ignored my existence so whatever, I stopped caring and let them decide amongst themselves. They're big boys they can deal with it.
That's when someone privately messaged me. This bitch named Karma who was all like "I'm sure you know who I am" like- okay, whatever, Karma. And she's all like "did you vote for the uniform color?" So I said no.
She then said to look at the colors and see which one I liked best, and the contest was between these two colors, blue and purple. I went blue because I like it more than purple and if I'm pushing for CMYK, it is in my interest to pick the blue. I tell her this and she's like "oh but... don't you wanna pick the purple though?"
Oh is that what this is? You're not being all nice to me and asking if I voted because you actually care. You just want me to vote for the one you want. Okay, Karma. Fine. I'll vote for the purple if it'll make you shut the fuck up.
Is what I would have said if I wasn't trying to be nice. So I just went "okay purple ig" and voted purple. Then ignored her "thank you" message cause, frankly, you couldn't pay me to give a shit.
I had to actively resist calling every single one of my classmates brain dead assholes yesterday. They're all actually so annoying and I could keep telling stories about how much they piss me off, but I think you get the point.
If only saying "how the fuck did you make it past third grade" was okay.
can i like
strangle her she sounds like an absolute bitch /nay
purple uniforms give me trauma RAAAAHHHH (iykyk)
trust me if I could strangle her I would. She was absent today tho yay!
Also, real. I wish I stayed another year or something so you wouldn't have had to be there alone. Oh well.
meow
I'm so hungy :(
arf arf (idk either)
meow
ARF ARF ARF
GRRRRRR 😡😡
ARF ARF 🤬😡🤬
HISSSS MEOWWW D:<
GRRRRRRRRR GRRRR 😡😡😡
MEOWWWWW HISSSSSS
IM ALIVE WHO CHEERED
after like years sobs
Hola
Welcome back to the land of the living
omg i didnt know u kept a picture of me woah /j
yeah it's from the cameras I hid in your house- I mean... what? 😁
I CHEERED!! HI HELLO HII HI
HII WAVES
HIIIII WAVES
How it feels being here alone:
HEY HEY UR NOT ALONE 🙋♀️
YOUVE JUST BEEN SILENT THIS WHOLE TIME 😭😭😭
NOOO LMAO I JUST BASICALLG CAME BACK IVE BEEN SO BUSY 😭😭
Wow. I have been pretty busy too I have to study for like the ACTs and such and idek if I'm gonna end up getting a spot or if they're all taken.
yall I'm so done with school fr. So fucking done.
Me when the show has SO MUCH POTENTIAL to be SO GOOD but the writers are just so fucking terrible-
Miraculous Ladybug (at this point the show is a joke and it kills me that it could've been a lot more than what it is)
Voltron (imagine killing all your characters both metaphorically and physically and the only characters you didn't kill are characters who were hardly even characters in the first place)
Star vs the Forces of Evil (sigh... no comment.)
Glee (as much as this show is... certainly a show and everyone loves to shit on it you can't deny that the idea itself COULD have been actually good)
Stranger Things (needs a whole essay by itself cause... yikes)
Old Man McGucket: a Character Analysis
I'm going to preface this essay by saying, I have not read any of the books except for screenshots from people who actually have them, so this essay is strictly going to be about the show and maybe like... five book pages idk-
Spoilers, duh. But the essay is better if you haven't watched the show, but don't read it if you're ever planning to. This is like majorly important plot spoilers.
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Old Man McGucket. The crazy old guy who actually turns out to have a hell of a lot of plot relevance in a crazy twist that was foreshadowed in a way that people generally overlooked as "crazy shenanigans from the crazy shenanigans show". Wait a minute...
(vine boom goes here)
Yeah, McGucket and Simon are pretty similar for multiple reasons. But we're not here to talk about that. We're here to talk about the incredibly dark reality of Old Man McGucket. A man who didn't lose his mind, but instead, locked it away himself.
THE SHOW:
We are introduced to McGucket in the second episode of the first season, The Legend of the Gobblewonker. Grunkle Stan drags Dipper and Mabel to go fishing with him, as they're there, they see this crazy old man screaming about something called a "Gobblewonker" a strange Loch Ness Monster type creature that hides out on a mysterious island off the shore. Everyone calls him crazy, but Dipper and Mabel decide to go hunt down this Gobblewonker and take a picture of it to win a photo contest, ditching Grunkle Stan in the process. Eventually they learn that the "Gobblewonker" isn't actually real, but instead a robot made by the crazy old guy at the start in order to get attention from his son. This crazy old guy is Old Man McGucket.
Immediately from this first episode intro we learn a couple of things about Old Man McGucket. He has a son, who is never mentioned ever again in the show. His wife left him. He has a knack for machinery. He's generally viewed as crazy by the characters, and, let's be honest... he is. Now immediately you have a couple of questions. Why is this crazy old guy a robot genius? He doesn't seem like a mad scientist type, more like a hillbilly. So what's up with that? Good question. Keep that in your pocket for now.
For the rest of the season McGucket never really shows up in any prominent roles. He's really just a crazy old hillbilly prospector-y guy who just so happens to be pretty good with machines. It's not really questioned. It is brought up multiple times, but otherwise ignored. So, whatever. Crazy shenanigans from the crazy shenanigans show, right? Well not this crazy shenanigans show, because, ultimately, Gravity Falls is made for theorists and mystery solvers. Encoded messages. Hidden clues. Itty bitty details that all allude to the bigger picture. The solution to the question... what is going on in Gravity Falls? That and who wrote The Journals, but that's not the point.
The point is that the Gravity Falls fandom is full of people who look into every little detail to solve mysteries. So McGucket being good with machines? No way that's just a crazy shenanigan.
So, what do we know about the author of the journals? He had six fingers. He was good with machines. He's probably been in Gravity Falls for a while. And Journal 3 is his last journal he was writing before he mysteriously... stopped.
McGucket fits two of those. Good with machines and lived in Gravity Falls for a while. But... we can reasonably make him fit the other two. Six fingers? His right arm is in a cast. Maybe he used to have six fingers, maybe something happened. Writing mysteriously stopped? McGucket is repeatedly shown to be basically insane so... maybe that's why he stopped writing the journals. Because something so horrific and terrible happened to him that he lost his mind, and so he stopped writing. That's it. All the signs point to-
Oh. Nevermind then.
Now that the theory is no longer that McGucket is the author of the journals, and instead it's Stan's secret twin brother... then who is McGucket?
For that... we need to look at season 2.
Specifically the episodes 2, 4, and 7.
Season 2, episode 2, Into the Bunker is partially an episode about Dipper's crush on Wendy and partially a lore episode. Dipper, Mabel, Soos, and Wendy head on an adventure to find the author of the journals's secret hideout, which is apparently in a tree. They find it and make it in. While down there they find a shapeshifting monster that tries to kill them and steal Journal 3. They escape, trapping the monster in a cryochamber and immediately leaving the secret hideout. On the way out, Soos managed to grab what he thought was a briefcase. As it turns out, the "briefcase" was, in fact, an only slightly wrecked laptop with the words "Property of F" written at the top. Soos says he can fix it and that's the episode. (Minus Wendy and Dipper stuff)
Season 2, episode 4, Sock Opera. Soos has finally fixed the laptop so now all Dipper and Mabel need to do is open it and they'll figure it all out. The author of the journals, the secrets of Gravity Falls, all of it at the click of a button! Exceepptt the laptop is unfortunately password locked. An eight letter word is between them and... essentially, everything the show has built up toward. Mabel gets distracted making a sock opera to impress a boy, and in an act of desperation, Dipper makes a deal with Bill Cipher, the main antagonist of the entire show, for a vessel in exchange for the password to the laptop. Bill takes over Dipper's body and immediately smashes the laptop thereby destroying any chance of opening it and we never find out the password. Bill is defeated in the end, but the laptop is destroyed and they're no closer to finding the author of the journals than before. Or are they? (Vsauce music starts)
Season 2. Episode 7. Society of the Blind Eye. We open on Lazy Susan closing up the diner. We see her kick out some rats, and Old Man McGucket from underneath a table, then on her way out she sees the gnomes from episode one stealing her pie. She's shocked, startled, bamboozled, but before she can really react a bunch of people wearing red coats just... take her away. Then the opening plays.
We're back to Mabel and Dipper trying to find the author of the journals, and upon closer inspection of the destroyed laptop that supposedly belonged to the author, they see a branding thing on it. This little piece of metal that says "McGucket Labs" so they piece together that McGucket could be the author of the journals. His first name is Fiddleford (I think this is the first time we learn that in the show), and the laptop says "Property of F", and all the evidence adds up. Of course, most of the fandom by now has moved on from the McGucket theory. So there's no way that's all there is to this episode. Of course not. That'd be incredibly stupid and a huge waste of time covering this episode.
So Mabel and Dipper go running to find McGucket. They find him with his house being vandalized by teens writing the words "Mc Suck-it" and McGucket promptly shooing them off his property. Dipper tells McGucket to drop the act and that he knows who he is, but McGucket says he hardly remembers anything. So they got to the last place he can recall in his memory which is the museum.
At the museum they discover a secret passageway which leads them to a secret meeting between a bunch of people in red robes. They all watch as the robed men erase Lazy Susan's memory of the gnomes with some weird looking ray gun. They conclude that the weird robed guys are the reason McGucket can't remember anything. That they did something to him to make him the way he is. So they resolve to find McGucket's memories and bring them back so he can remember everything.
After fighting the Blind Eye Society and then erasing all their memories of the society ever existing, they finally go to watch McGucket's memories and figure out everything that happened. And this... is where everything is revealed.
They play the memories, and we see a young man on screen. He's wearing glasses, a blazer and tie, and looks to be of good health and sound mind. He introduces himself as Fiddleford Hadron McGucket. He explains that he, for the past year, has been helping this scientist, the author of the journals, build some kind of... machine. But... something went wrong. Something terrible. So terrible that it haunts McGucket every day. So he invented something. Something to erase this terrible memory of what he helped build. The ray gun that the Blind Eye Society used. The very first thing he erases from his mind is erased right in front of us. He erases... "Fiddleford". The very first thing McGucket took away from his own brain... is himself.
We watch him come up with the Society of the Blind Eye. A society made to help people forget the terrible things they've seen. To help everyone live in blissful ignorance of what's really going on in Gravity Falls. The zombies. The gnomes. Everything.
We watch as McGucket erases more of his memories. We watch him get older, we watch his hair grey, we watch his beard grow, his glasses break and eventually disappear. We watch as he starts to forget words, talk faster. We watch him progressively lose his mind more and more. We watch him erase his own memories... to the point of no return. No one did this to McGucket. He did this to himself.
But... what happened to drive him to such drastic measures? What made him become so paranoid and so scared that he locked his memories away in hopes of never thinking about it again? What did McGucket see?
For that... we need to go back. Way back.
FIDDLEFORD HADRON MCGUCKET:
Fiddleford McGucket. Grew up on a hog farm in Tennessee with, well, not exactly what you call a lot of money.
He was, however, skilled in mechanics, and was pretty smart, which got him into Backupsmore University in the mid-1970s where he met Stanford Pines. The author of the journals and the twin brother of Stanley Pines. After he graduated he made his own computer business called "Fiddleford Computermajigs" but in the middle of his work he received a call from Ford saying he needed a mechanical genius to help him build a transuniversal poly-dimensional metavortex in his basement in Gravity Falls, Oregon. Fiddleford agrees, leaving his wife and son behind.
From then on, Fiddleford was Ford's research assistant. He helped Ford with all of his studies and any machine building needs, and even was so nice as to get him a Christmas present, yet forgot to get one for his actual wife. By the way, the password to his laptop, the one found in the bunker, was "Stanford" which is certainly a choice. But we're not here to talk about doomed old man yaoi, back to the normal conversation.
So, while Fiddleford was working with Ford, a Gremloblin, half goblin, half gremlin, attacks Fiddleford staring him right in the eyes which makes him see his worst nightmare. We don't actually know what Fiddleford saw in the Gremloblin's eyes. But we do know how it affected him. In the physical copy of Journal 3 we learn more. Stanford writes that he's been worried about Fiddleford since his encounter with the Gremloblin, saying that he hasn't slept or even fixed his Rubik's Cube since then. He tells Fiddleford to "use his creativity to solve his problems" intending to talk about meditation and such, but as we know... Fiddleford didn't quite take it like that. He used his creativity alright. He used it to build the mind eraser gun. Soon enough Fiddleford started to rely on the gun for everything. Every bad memory, every painful experience, everything he just didn't want to think about anymore. It worked like a drug, and boy, was Fiddleford an addict.
When Ford confronted him, Fiddleford, instead of dealing with his problems, simply erased Ford's memory of the gun entirely so he could use it freely without Ford knowing. Ford, of course, already wrote about the gun in the journal, so while he forgot about it, it was written down so he knew it existed. It's also implied that Fiddleford used the gun multiple times on Ford.
Nonetheless construction continues on the transuniversal poly-dimensional metavortex. During a test run where they sent a dummy into the metavotrex, Fiddleford's leg got caught on the rope and he was therefore dragged through the metavortex, seeing the other side briefly before Ford saved him.
Once he emerged, Ford asked what he saw and Fiddleford immediately told Ford that the portal was in fact dangerous and he never should've built it in the first place. He said it would bring about the end of the world and to "fear the beast with just one eye"
What? This guy? He's a floating dorito chip, I'm sure he's harmless...
(He's wanted in the entire multiverse.)
So, Fiddleford quits the project saying he'd "just as soon forget" and so... he erased his mind of what he saw on the other side of the portal. And he started... the society of the blind eye. In Journal 3, Ford writes about how he's had weird dreams of Fiddleford looming in the dark with a red robe on, and he wonders if they were really just dreams. Fiddleford has probably erased a lot from Ford's mind and plenty of the townsfolk, but to no degree near what he's erased from his own mind.
It only got worse. And worse. And worse. Until he, of course, became the Old Man McGucket we see at the start of the show. Of course, he still retains just a little bit of his former identity, before he became what he is. This shows in his skill with mechanical engineering, and also his knowledge of things like the Gobblewonker. Even in this... state, he can't ever truly forget everything he's tried so hard to.
Fiddleford went through a great trauma that left him mentally unwell, and how did he cope? By shoving it all into a high security prison in the corner of his mind where he never had to think about any of it ever again. This of course is a terrible coping mechanism because, none of it is actually ever gone... it's just hidden from view. And it'll never be fully gone of course, but shoving it away only makes it worse, like prisoners working out and getting super buff in prison.
All of this damaged McGucket's brain so badly that the memory gun couldn't even be used on him anymore. That's how bad it got.
In The Book Of Bill, Bill actually talks about an attempt to possess Fiddleford. And this... is what urged me to write this essay. Bill Cipher, the person who literally laughs at pain, like literally laughs, he enjoys it, went into Fiddleford's mind and he says that he's never been in a mind so damaged, so broken, so shattered beyond repair, that it actually hurt. And, in his words, "for the first time, I felt a pain that wasn't funny."
Bill Cipher, the guy who finds great pleasure in being a manipulative asshole and TORTURING PEOPLE, said this. The unimaginable pain and suffering McGucket must be going through, the torture that was inflicted on him as well as the torture he inflicted upon himself... it was so bad, that not even Bill Cipher could laugh. What was originally just a crazy old guy with possible ties to the Author... turned out to be a deeply damaged and traumatized man.
This is the most tragic character in Gravity Falls. I don't even know how to end this essay... I can't even make a joke.
I really need to finish reading Hitchiker's Guide because it's melting my brain with thoughts of it and yet I still haven't picked the book up in days.
i might babble a bit too much but i can NOT get over this performance. well the entire tour itself, but the iconic 1989 tour in 2014-2015. honestly this WAS her best vocal tour recorded. not eras, not reputation, not speak now, not red, and not fearless, but 1989 honestly will always be my favorite vocal concert of taylor’s. her voice was so young but so STRONG at the same time, and sadly she did hurt her vocals to make such rough notes while she sang at this concert but like
this just proves WHY people call her the music industry. she was only 26, and she was singing CRAZY vocals, and with only FIVE albums released. either way, she had been making records SINCE 2007 when she released debut. literally 2009 and she’s selling out STADIUMS for her second album, and she was TWENTY. insane, it will always blow my mind. but let’s focus on 1989 rn
so 1989 era was really a handful, since during it she went through her ED, and she was JUST beginning to release her pop music, like 1989 was her first pop album after doing mostly country for 8 years. but the concert oh my GOD i would’ve died if i could’ve gone…my cousin went she calls it a fuckin’ fever dream dude 😭, like yes, movie/documentary is VERY badly edited and all but like
the VOCALS people, the VOCALS.
take example one of her most iconic performances till this fucking day
(4.55)
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uTs6GcImbMI&pp=ygUab3V0IG9mIHRoZSB3b29kcyAxOTg5IHRvdXI%3D
like wow, it never fails to actually shock me to how good she sounds. this was the best bridge before any of her newer albums came out, but the way she sings so loud and so powerful is just like chilling everytime i listen to it
i could write an essay based on this fucking performance SOLEY, THATS how good it is. not a lot of singers are labeled; “THE music industry” at the age of 26. and since then, she’s maintained that title with other amazing albums…she recorded NINE albums in FIVE years while touring and filming TWO documentaries. that is WHAT the music industry does. but 1989 era oh my god what a time that was
don’t even get me started on reputation and eras tour like those
they literally
like.
wow.
mind boggling.
but yeah she’s my favorite artist for a reason lmao 😭
im also starting to listen to noah kahan and honestly he’s a pretty good artist
i like his lyrics
i’ve also started listening to gigi perez
she’s so good
Imagine my power if I didn't have the restraint of a character limit. I could write hour long essays about so many topics everyone would block me.
i’m afraid this has happened too me!
Oh wow, the character limit is like my biggest enemy rn, but I just need confirmation. Listen, I need you to read the two essays I wrote and tell me if they're good enough for me to make a commentary channel on yt or if I should stick to keeping my essays here or to myself. It's just that I have so many things I wanna talk about and so many ideas and stuff so I was thinking of doing one of those commentary channel things that mostly focuses on fandom content and fandom spaces yk- but idk if I'm that good at wording my essays. Obviously they would be better if I didn't have the character limit restrictions but just as they stand now are they good or absolute shit.
okay! i’ll read them rn
I wanted to do a wlw ship for part 3 of the "its gay" series but I'm struggling so hard with finding a good one because
1. I have to know and like the ship
2. It can't be canon because that's not what I'm here to talk about
3. It has to have something to it that I can write a full essay about
Finding an mlm ship like that is so easy. I can do it right now. Johnlock, Hilson, Hannigraham, Spirk, Wrightworth, Riddlebird(Gotham). I could do this in my sleep.
But finding a wlw ship like that is like finding a needle in a haystack except it's a really small haystack and also there are no needles in it. Every mainstream wlw ship is either canon or I don't know or like it. And if I do happen to find one that isn't canon and I do like it it's hardly anything worth a full essay.
I could talk about Morgwen but I've already discussed a BBC Merlin ship yk. I think I might just give up looking and cover Johnlock like I originally planned.
Just the difference in the frequency between mainstream mlm ships and mainstream wlw ships. There are significantly more mlm ships and they are always significantly more popular than wlw ships. Good job, everyone, misogyny at it's finest.
Sour (poem by me)
When life gives you lemons
You cant make orange juice with them
You have to make lemonade
No matter how hard you try or what you do
A lemon will never be an orange
No matter how much you wish you had oranges
No matter how bad you want it
You have to make lemonade
Because it's all you've got
It's all you can do
An unsatisfactory cup of lemonade
If it looks like a duck
And quacks like a duck
It's gay! (Part 2):
Merthur (BBC Merlin)
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BBC seems to have a track record of taking existing IPs and making them uh... suddenly a lot... gayer. Sherlock and Merlin, like, jeez guys, wtf. (BBC Sherlock might be covered in part 3 maybe)
Merlin was released in 2008, ending in 2012 with one of the most devastating finales ever to exist. More devastating than Supernatural (spn fans don't come at me).
It's especially devastating with the most popular ship of the show. It's actually so queercoded it's crazy. (PS, been a while since I've watched the show so my memory may be fuzzy)
Merthur:
Let's talk about Merthur. The slash ship between Merlin and Arthur Pendragon.
At the start of the show, Merlin, a young sorcerer, is sent to the kingdom of Camelot by his mother. There he meets Arthur Pendragon, prince of Camelot, heir to the throne, and supreme asshole, being a dick to someone. Merlin jumps in to stop this and tells Arthur that's enough, but Arthur is just like "Do I know you?" And so Merlin is like "you're right, you don't, I wouldn't associate with an asshole like you" and uh... well Arthur replies with... the single gayest thing he could've said... ever.
Okay, calm down, sir.
Obviously that isn't what he meant, but I mean... like, come on- just this entire interaction because Merlin replies that he wouldn't wanna do that and Arthur says why, and Merlin says "you have no idea what I'm gonna do to you" and GUYS CAN WE STOP BEING GAY FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS
Not to mention that they're, what, INCHES away from each other. Guys now is NOT the time.
Anyway, Merlin tries to punch Arthur and is very easily taken down and sent to the dungeon for trying to punch the future king of Camelot. Gaius, the court physician and also the person Merlin is staying with while he's in Camelot, gets him out of there.
He meets Guinevere, the maid of Lady Morgana, the king's ward, and she tells him that standing up to Arthur was brave, but it's a good thing they didn't fight because he would've lost, Merlin says he could've totally beat up Arthur and she says "you don't look like one of those big muscle-y men" HA HA SHE CALLED HIM A TWINK. Keep Guinevere in mind. Gwen.
Anyway, magic is illegal in Camelot, so Merlin's sorcerer stuff needs to be kept under wraps. Magic is totally not an allegory for anything else at all.
Merlin and Arthur meet again, and they're back to being very gay. Arthur aks how Merlin's "knee-walking" is coming along and says he could "take you apart in one blow" and Merlin replies "I could take you apart with less than that" okay, guys, there are children present. You might wanna tone it down a little.
I know they're technically arguing here, but... this entire scene should just have a gay flag overlay because seriously wtf is this. You just... have to watch it. It's so gay it almost hurts. It is actually gayer than gay sex.
So anyway later on Merlin goes into a cave under the castle where the last dragon alive is being held and he talks to this dragon who tells him that he's destined to be Arthur's boyfriend- I mean destined to help Arthur save the kingdom. Yeah. There we go. The dragon specifically says that Arthur is "the once and future king who will save Albion." Merlin is upset at this and is like "nuh uh, that guy's a dick, you're a lying ass dragon" so the dragon peaces out, explaining absolutely nothing to Merlin, or the audience, as he calls out after it. Fun.
Anyway fancy dinner party time, Lady Morgana enters and all eyes turn to look at her. Merlin too and though he seems to think she looks good and even compliments her, it's not exactly too big of a reaction in contrast to Arthur's reaction. Though we can assume "well that's just Arthur" in light of how the scene plays out, Merlin's reaction seems a little tame. (Gay ass mf)
At the fancy dinner party some lady tries to assassinate Arthur and Merlin saves his life. Because of this, Uther, Arthur’s father, tells Merlin he must be rewarded for this. How does he reward Merlin? By making him Arthur's manservant, of course! Yay episode one over!
So now Merlin is Arthur's manservant and in this like knight battle thingy he has to help Arthur get into his armor before the battle and clean his armor after it. Merlin was at first annoyed at being ordered around by Arthur, but eventually we see him smiling and even talking to Arthur like his friend. Arthur obviously replies to all this with more orders for Merlin because he's still Arthur. The point is, Merlin is warming up to the situation he's in.
He finds out about ANOTHER plot to kill Arthur in the battle thing. So he's set on stopping it. This guy is bringing the snakes drawn on his shield to life so they can bite and kill Arthur in the final battle. Before he can do this, Merlin finds out and cuts one of the snakes' head off taking it to Arthur as proof.
Arthur doesn't believe him at first but Merlin says "I know I'm just a servant and my word doesn't matter but I would never lie to you" Arthur tells him to swear it and so Merlin does and Arthur believes him.
So they go in front of the king to accuse this guy of using magic but little do they know he actually knows they know so he killed the only credible witness to the snakes meaning the accusation had no legs to stand on other than a snake head. This makes Arthur look like he's trying to get out of the battle with this guy, basically he looks like a coward.
So he gets mad at Merlin, saying he trusted him and that he's sacking Merlin for a servant he can actually trust. Their first break up. 😔
Merlin goes to the dragon like "bitch, now I know you're a lying ass dragon, there's no way it's my destiny to protect this guy, he hates me." Then the dragon is like "a half cannot truly hate that which makes it whole" wow, describing Merlin and Arthur as two halves of the same whole. That's hetero. Okay well, arguably, it could be hetero in the sense that I could say that abt my best friend, but just the dragon like "you and Arthur’s paths lie together" I mean... come on.
Anyway Merlin goes ahead and saves Arthur’s life for the second time. Get used to this. Arthur then tells Merlin he made a mistake by firing him and that he wants him back as his manservant. Arthur doesn't know Merlin saved him btw cause he saved him with magic and magic is illegal. Regardless, Arthur here, though he admits to being wrong, doesn't really say sorry. Most likely because he's emotionally constipated, a nice gift from his father.
I think you get the point by now. Over the course of the episodes we see Merlin and Arthur grow closer. Merlin repeatedly saving Arthur, sometimes even at the risk of his own life and Arthur becoming less of a prat. Also... so... so much eye sex. Like... an unbelievable amount of eye sex...
Btw Guinivere is implied to have a crush on Merlin at the start of the show, with the way she acts around him and such. Merlin however is more casual when it comes to their interactions. He's not flirting or anything he's just being Merlin. (Gay ass mf.)
In one episode Merlin falls deathly ill. Guinevere and Arthur are extremely worried and the only antidote is in a very dangerous cave and so Arthur is like "I volunteer as tribute!" But his dad is like "no way, you're the prince, you're not risking your life for a mere SERVANT." And Arthur is just like "uhm, actually, I think I will" so he goes to the cave anyway, and Merlin EVEN IN HIS COMATOSE STATE SENSES THAT ARTHUR NEEDS HIS HELP so he summons a glowing orb to light Arthur's way through the cave. So Arthur gets the antidote and gets it back to Gaius and leaves, probably to get an earful from his dad. Merlin wakes up to Gwen and Gaius and Gwen immediately kisses him because she's just so relieved he's alive. She apologizes and Merlin says "it's okay" then immediately after this episode the Merlin/Guinevere storyline is dropped. (Wow, Merlin, pretty gay of you)
Let's recap, after however many times Merlin has risked his own life to save Arthur’s, Arthur is now RISKING HIS LIFE FOR MERLIN'S. He's also shown to be one of the people who are MOST worried about Merlin, and this cast of characters includes, Gwen who's implied to be crushing on Merlin and Gaius who's literally his caretaker and is like a parent to him. And Merlin and Arthur’s souls are SO intertwined that even WHILE COMATOSE they can sense when the other is in danger.
Arthur also isn't there to watch Merlin wake up and doesn't even tell Merlin that he's the one who saved his life. What an emotionally constipated bitch. But you see at the start of the show Arthur would never and I mean NEVER have risked his own life for a servant's. And this positive change in Arthur is BECAUSE OF MERLIN.
Now that the Merlin/Guinevere has been dropped, we move along to Arthur/Guinevere. So Arthur and Guinevere talk and Guinevere gives Arthur a piece of her mind then quickly apologizes and Arthur’s like "no, it's fine, no one's ever talked to me like that" and... Arthur... MERLIN has talked to you like that. MULTIPLE TIMES. 🤨
The dragon repeatedly tells Merlin that he and Arthur are "two sides of the same coin" and other such prophetic stuff about how they're gay for each other.
Not only would either of them recklessly THROW THEMSELVES INTO DANGER for the other, but Merlin even made the CONSCIOUS DECISION to make sure Arthur NEVER LEGALIZES MAGIC THE ONE THING THAT HAS BEEN CAUSING MERLIN THE GREATEST AMOUNT OF SUFFERING OVER THE COURSE OF THE ENTIRE SHOW JUST FOR THE SAKE OF ARTHUR. HE WOULD THROW AWAY SOMETHING AS IMPORTANT AS THAT IF IT MEANT ARTHUR WAS SAFE.
When king Uther dies, in a later episode his ghost is summoned and he and Arthur talk. Uther runs his mouth about Gwen, Arthur’s literal actual wife, and Arthur is upset at this ofc, but when Uther so much as utters ONE WORD about MERLIN, Arthur is immediately like "now you done did it" and GETS RID OF HIS FUCKING GHOST. Not because he talked about Gwen or ANYONE ELSE FOR THAT MATTER. Because he talked about MERLIN.
I must clarify, I don't think this means Arthur doesn't love Gwen, because he does (bisexual ass mf), but is Gwen the one whose destiny is intertwined with his? Uh, I don't think so.
In an episode, Merlin is upset, and all he does is WALK INTO THE ROOM and Arthur is immediately like "what's wrong?" and trying to cheer him up.
In another episode, Merlin is in danger and Arthur WAKES UP IN A COLD SWEAT WITH HIS ACTUAL FUCKING WIFE (Gwen) NEXT TO HIM AND THE FIRST WORD OUT OF HIS MOUTH IS MERLIN'S NAME. AND THEN HE JUST FUCKING LEAVES TO GO FIND HIM.
When your husband wakes up from his sleep out of nowhere, saying his manservants name then immediately running out to go find him like you aren't even there: 🤨🏳️🌈?
By the way, once again with the SENSING WHEN THE OTHER IS IN DANGER. Like... come on.
Merlin has become less of a manservant for Arthur and more of one of the only people he can trust. His closest confidante. Someone he can rely on and he hopes can rely on him.
For Merlin, Arthur becomes less of a prat he's destined to protect and more of someone he cares about deeply and would go to any length to protect. Someone he would do anything for not because he has to, but because he just cares that much.
But through all of that there's still that one problem. That one thing they can't talk about, at least not normally. Because of certain laws.
Magic = Gay?:
In this world, magic was outlawed by king Uther because people were using magic for evil purposes (because magic killed his grandma, okay!) This caused the kingdom to be a little not okay. So basically a bunch of people with magic were trying to assassinate Arthur because of this law, because they don't want the law to continue so if the Pendragon bloodline ends hopefully the next king will be better and get rid of the rule.
Magic itself, in this world, is not something you can do unless you're born with it except for certain types like potions and stuff. But to do magic from your own two hands by yourself that you have to be born with. You don't get a say in it, you're just born with magic. And this magic isn't just something you have, no, it's a part of you. It's who you are. Merlin even says "if I can't use magic I might as well die". Magic is something personal to the user and with it being outlawed everyone with magic is forced to hide away a part of themselves. To lock it away and make sure no one sees such a dangerous disgusting side of who they are. But... magic, when used for the right reasons, isn't dangerous or disgusting at all. The actions of the few of magic users who did bad things created a punishment that affected all magic users. That forced them to live their lives agreeing with others on how terrible magic is when, behind closed doors, they can make objects float and bring statues to life.
Lady Morgana, remember her? She has magic. At the start of the show she didn't actually know she had it, but she does. We're shown her repeatedly talking to Gwen about men and mostly men. But the way she talks about it is surface level and superficial like a teenager with a boyfriend that'll last for a week before he's dumped. Meanwhile it seems as though she cares about Gwen herself deeper than that, than those superficial feelings she talks about.
Merlin is shown to not really have a lot of interest in women despite the kiss with Gwen and one scene with Morgana, but even then he's pretty... tame about it. He rarely has any sort of love interest type scenes with women. In fact half the men who get introduced in the show that Merlin becomes close with seem more like love interests than the women.
All of this seems a little... familiar. That's right, folks. Magic is an allegory for being gay. Lady Morgana is a lesbian (another win for the sapphics)!
And this is the one thing that Merlin can't tell Arthur about. The one thing he has to keep from him. Because if Arthur knew what Merlin was... well... who knows. He can never tell him the truth. Unless he's forced to.
The Finale:
I would explain the entire episode but it's just not important to the point of this. (Well I mean maybe kind of but...... okay it's complicated and like- just, I'm not gonna get into it) So let's get right into the important part. The ending.
Arthur is dying. And if Merlin doesn't get him to a very specific place very fast... Arthur isn't going to make it. So Merlin is determined to get it done no matter what. He carries the dying Arthur around on a horse all day. On the way the encounter a couple of fuckers who like hate the kingdom or something or other it is actually really not important uhm Lady Morgana is evil btw. So Merlin is forced to hide the fact that Arthur is a knight of Camelot, and also the fucking king. But the fuckers actually find out and they're about to attack them when Merlin uses magic to stop them. In front of Arthur. For the first time. After all this time. Arthur finally knows the truth. And in this scene Arthur isn't mad because Merlin has magic. He's mad because Merlin lied to him.
In Arthur's eyes this was a betrayal. The person he thought he could trust more than anyone else, the person he considered to be someone he could always rely on to tell the truth... has kept something so big from him all these years. Arthur isn't mad because Merlin has magic. That's not the part he's mad about. It's that Merlin didn't tell him.
They continue and encounter more fuckers along the way which they expertly avoid thanks to Merlin's magic and Arthur being the observant fellow he is recognizes that this isn't the first time Merlin's had to cover for Arthur.
When Arthur mentions this and mentions the fact that he never tried to take credit for what he did, covering Arthur's ass every time he did something stupid or someone tried to kill him, Merlin says that's not why he does it. He doesn't stick his neck out for Arthur for fame or glory. He did it for Arthur. Sure, you can reasonably make the argument that he did it cause he's a good person or cause it was his destiny, but the way he looks at Arthur in this scene and the way Arthur reacts. It's clearly not the intended meaning. What Merlin is saying here is "I did it all for you. Because I care about you and I don't want to see you hurt or worse, dead."
When night falls, Merlin and Arthur stop to rest.
Merlin tends to Arthur, giving hin water, trying to keep him alive as long as possible. Arthur starts speaking, saying "whatever happens-" before he's cut off by Merlin telling him not to speak. Arthur tells Merlin that he's the king and Merlin can't order him around, but Merlin says it's never stopped him before so why should he change now. Arthur replies to this with "I don't want you to change. I want you to always be you. I'm sorry about how I treated you." Arthur then falls asleep and Merlin tells him to get some rest, not replying to what Arthur just said but it's evident in his face that it affected him. This scene is also sponsored by too much eye sex to be hetero. (If you think I'm joking about how much eye sex they have... I wish I was)
Later they're just barely at their destination but Arthur is dying faster than Merlin can get him to where they're going, especially since the horses ran off.
So now Merlin is desperately trying to save Arthur and he's just in complete denial about the whole situation, trying to convince himself there's a way they can still make it, but Arthur just shuts him down. He tells him to stop and "just... hold me... please." This is Arthur’s only request as he's dying. For Merlin to just... hold him. Just... be there. That's all he wants.
He tells Merlin that he wants to say something to him before he dies. Especially now that he knows everything Merlin's done for him. He wants to say something he's never said to him before. "Thank you." And those are his last words as he finally dies and Merlin cries over him.
Except... wait. Arthur has said "thank you" to Merlin before. Maybe not often... but he said it. There are even compilations of it. Maybe the creators just forgot. Or...
Maybe this scene wasn't meant to end with "thank you".
Maybe this scene was meant to end with something the creators weren't allowed to say.
Maybe... Arthur was supposed to say... "I love you."
His dying breath, his last words are to Merlin and Merlin alone. No one else. Just Merlin. It was always Merlin.
Merlin screams begging for Arthur to wake up, and obviously he doesn't so Merlin calls on the dragon for help. When the dragon arrives it just tells Merlin "Arthur is the once and future king" emphasis on the "once" part. Arthur was always going to die. It was destined. And we were told it from the beginning. Arthur would die then rise again to save Albion when they need him most, centuries later. Then the dragon flies off leaving Merlin to deal with his grief.
We see Gwen become the only ruler on the throne since Arthur is now dead. She legalizes magic btw and fixes the kingdom kind of, but that's not important to this essay. (Love Gwen so much actually)
We cut to a timeskip. Centuries in the future. Present (2012) day. We see Merlin. He must've used magic to stay alive all these years. All these years. He stayed alive and waited. Waited for King Arthur to return. And he still waits. No matter how long it takes. For Arthur. The once and future king.
I want to note, this was longer, I had to cut it down to fit the character limit.
In this cut I had to sacrific a lot of important information by the way, seriously, a lot. If only I could write proper full essay here.
I'm starting a series. You're all gonna have to deal with this until I get bored of it.
If it looks like a duck
And quacks like a duck
It's gay! (Part 1):
Klance (Voltron: Legendary Defender)
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Ah, Voltron. The show that ruined lives, friendships, and cause a giant mob of people to start sending death threats to innocent people who worked on the show all because they didn't smash two characters faces together. What a time.
I'm lucky enough to have not been a part of that uhm... unfortunate situation. You see, I am one of the sane fans of Voltron and I also didn't even have any social media at the time so even if I was angry, it's not like I even knew how to send a death threat.
But what's all the fuss about? Why's everyone so pissed cause their favs didn't share a passionate kiss in the series finale? Surely, the anger over such a simple thing is completely unjustified, right?
Yes, actually, sending death threats to artists and animators who had LITERALLY NOTHING to do with how the show was written, no, scratch that, sending death threats to ANYONE AT ALL is completely unjustified.
But minus the death threats, was the fandom justified in being pissed off at the way the relationship was handled? In my professional opinion... yes.
Klance:
Let's talk about Klance. The slash (mlm) ship between Keith Kogane and Lance McClain.
I could spend this time exploring the history of the characters all the way back to the 1984 show, but I already made a super long intro so I think we should just get right into the meat of things.
Voltron Legendary Defender. The first season of the show was released on June 10th 2016 and immediately from the first episode Kieth and Lance have an established relationship.
A not-so-friendly rivalry of sorts originally one-sided as Keith didn't even know Lance existed, until the two met and Keith, being competitive and hot-headed, immediately started arguing back and forth with Lance, turning it into a mutual rivalry.
This rivalry is their main dynamic throughout most of the show. Lance annoys Keith, Keith and Lance argue.
Lance's dislike of Kieth is just very poorly concealed envy and insecurity, and Keith often tries to display himself as "above" the rivalry or Lance's childish behavior, but it's very clear that it only takes one annoying sentence from Lance for him to immediately stoop down to the same level.
Despite this however, Lance and Kieth are able to work together when it matters such as when it comes to forming Voltron and during some of the team building exercises in the second episode. Technically the fourth episode but the first three were three parts of the same episode.
Point is, gradually, the relationship between Keith and Lance became less of an angry tug-of-war and more of a kind of friendly but not really rivalry with them trying to one-up each other and exchanging banter a lot.
They are also often depicted together in the same shot, sitting next to each other, or even just standing near one another. They're portrayed as a sort of pair. Evident in their contrasting signature colors, blue and red, and their contrasting personalities, with Keith being more serious, hot-headed, and broody and Lance being more of a comedian, easy-going, flirtatious type.
A really big moment in their relationship happens early on in the show when the castle-ship is being attacked by Sendak, one of the antagonists. During the battle against Sendak, Lance is badly injured and is rendered incapacitated due to his injuries. But in a crucial moment, Lance wakes up and shoots Sendak's arm off, saving Kieth, and being an important factor in finally ending the battle. Kieth runs to Lance's side to check on him and Lance says "we did it... we are a good team..." giving a soft smile, which Keith returns.
In the next episode, we see Lance in a healing pod and Keith, in specific, being anxious for his recovery, more so than any of the other paladins, not even the ones who've been friends with Lance for way longer. Once Lance is out, though, he goes right back to bickering with Keith who says he thought they "had a bonding moment" and were past arguing, Lance denies knowing anything about any "bonding moment".
Later on in the episode, the Blue Lion is stolen by a female alien named Nyma who Lance was flirting with. She steals the Blue Lion by convincing Lance to give her a ride in it specifically by mentioning Keith, which makes Lance jealous so he immediately agrees which gets him chained to a tree. Keith gets it back, communicating to Lance that they got the Blue Lion. Lance then asks if Keith can come unchain him from the tree he's trapped on and Keith pretends that Lance is cutting out (there's more to this scene but that'll be covered in a different section of this essay) because of this Lance says "Oh, come on, I thought we bonded!" Showing he does very much remember the bonding moment and only pretended to not remember. (Because he didn't wanna think about it/deal with it at the time. He's literally me.)
Keith and Lance continue to be repeatedly shown as being the antithesis to each other. When they work together on a mission, Keith is shown to be talented but impulsive, making a plan that isn't really all that much of a plan and so Lance stops him and gives him a better plan, showing how Lance is less impulsive, and more strategic. Keith is also shown to always state his opinion bluntly, even if it's controversial and he never tries to really hide his thoughts or put up a front, unlike Lance who is almost always putting on some kind of performance in order to hide his true thoughts and emotions, to hide away his insecurities from people.
The next important moment happens in season two episode five. Keith and Lance are tired from a battle so they both just so happen to independently decide to head to the pool, and when they meet at the elevator going there, they're very displeased to see each other. Keith then says "Look. You stay on one side of the pool, and I'll stay on the other, and we'll be far far away from each other. Very. Far. Away." (Two bros chilling in a hot tub five feet apart cause they're not gay) unfortunately though, the elevator breaks down meaning Keith and Lance are forced to work together to get out. They climb up the elevator shaft... uh... wait idk how to explain this. They... they The Emperor's New Groove it, if you haven't watched that movie, then what are you even doing with your life. So they work together to get up until they realize that Altean pools are upside down anyway meaning they couldn't have swum in it if they wanted to.
In episode 6, Keith and Allura believe they're being tracked by Glara (the enemy) so they sneak out in an escape pod. When Lance hears about this he immediately assumes that Keith and Allura snuck out for other reasons. This makes him upset. When Keith and Allura return, Lance asks Keith if he's with Allura and Keith, naturally, says yes, to which Lance immediately says "like with her, with her or..?"
Lance is clearly jealous. Of Keith or of Allura? Good question. This is the same thing that happened in season one when the Blue Lion was stolen and the mere mention of Keith made Lance jealous. It's ambiguous who exactly he's jealous of. Now I know what you're saying "that's a bit of a stretch, isn't it?" And sure maybe it is, but it only gets worse.
Season 2 is more focused on Kieth finding out more about his past and coming to terms with it and it seems like Keith turning out to be half-galran doesn't really affect Keith and Lance's relationship as Lance doesn't treat him any differently after learning the news.
But in episode 10 when Lance is alone with a yupper he starts to describe his teammates. He seems excited when talking about each one, but when he gets to Keith he says "Keith is always doing things like flying into asteroid fields and black holes and cool junk like that" and in contrast to his excited manner of speaking about the rest of the paladins, when speaking about Keith he instead has a fond smile in his face. Hetero way to talk about your rival.
In the season 2 finale, Shiro, the team leader, goes missing. Keith is upset by this even blowing up at a team meeting over it. And this moment... when Keith is so visibly upset, the entire rest of the team all look to Lance to comfort him, and Lance, without even looking at the rest of the team or even knowing they're looking at him immediately walks up to comfort Keith. Despite all their bickering and their supposed "rivalrly" Lance is still the closest one to Keith minus Shiro. Lance is still the one to comfort him here. Lance still cares deeply about Keith.
Season 3, lovingly dubbed "the Klance season" by fans. With Shiro missing, the group was down one paladin, and their leader at that. So now the team have to decide on a new leader. Coran nominates Keith as the new leader and Lance immediately disagrees. Saying he wouldn't want Keith to lead him anywhere, Keith says he doesn't want that either, and that him being leader is just what Shiro wanted.
The Black Lion however picks Keith as it's new paladin. Meaning Keith would be leader. Keith however immediately rejects the idea, saying "I can't replace Shiro. You guys were right, I'm the loner, I'm not the leader Shiro thought I was." And once again Lance is the first one there to comfort him. He tells Keith that no one can replace Shiro, but the Black Lion chose Keith for a reason. It's because of this that Keith accepts his role as new team leader.
When Lance goes to try and pilot the Blue Lion, for some reason, it doesn't respond to him. Lance immediately takes this as meaning that he's not meant to be a paladin. He's upset but as soon as he voices this, the Red Lion roars. Lance becomes the new red paladin with Allura taking his place as blue paladin.
In episode 3, Keith impulsively leads the team into a dangerous situation not even stopping when the Blue Lion gets hit and Lance is the one who stops him, emphasizing that they're a team and have to stick together.
But, oopsie, the rest of team gets separated. Keith says it's his fault and he put them all in danger, ignoring them when they told him to stop, and Lance says "Yeah, you kinda did. But now we gotta fix it" he's not trying to convince Keith not to blame himself, because he is ultimately at fault, but he's stopping Keith from spiraling and basically saying "it's okay we can fix this" he's not saying YOU fix this. He's saying WE fix this. Him and Keith.
When Shiro gets back to the rest of the group, Lance goes to Keith's room to talk to him privately. Lance opens up to Keith saying that with Shiro back "that's one paladins too many" implying that he would be kicked off the team with Shiro piloting the Balck Lion, Keith piloting the Red Lion and Allura piloting the Blue Lion. This is the first time we ever see Lance being vulnerable with someone on screen. He's not putting on a performance or acting confident like he usually does. And this is all to Keith. Keith specifically. Keith catches on to what Lance is implying and tells him to "leave the math to Pidge" which seems to comfort Lance.
In season 4 Keith decides to leave Voltron in order to stay with the Blade of Marmora, a rebel group of Galran fighters against Zarkon, the same group his mother is part of. Lance in specific seems more shocked and hurt by this decision than anything else. The rest of the team is naturally upset but supportive, but none of them look hurt by the decision. Only Lance. Knowing Lance, this is most likely him blaming himself for Keith leaving. But naturally he just puts on a smile and even makes a joke asking who he's going to make fun of now that Keith is leaving.
Klance moments in the last few seasons are sparse but even then Lance and Keith are often portrayed as being closer to each other than anyone else with Lance opening up to Keith and Keith doing the same as they find mutual comfort in each other. Not even Allura, Lance's supposed love interest, gets the same level of vulnerability Lance has with Keith, and they each drive the other to be better, like a puzzle that just fits perfectly.
If not gay then why perfect antithesis to each other? If not gay then why only vulnerable with each other? If not gay then why always portrayed as a pair in basically every scene? I think you get it at this point. Keith and Lance are special to each other in a way no one else is. Still want more evidence? Okay.
Visuals:
Studio Mir is the animation studio that worked on Voltron, and just so happens to be the same studio that worked on Legend of Korra, a show with a canon wlw couple composed of two main characters. Studio Mir used certain visual cues to imply Korra's feelings for Asami before they were confirmed. Bisexual lighting in the background of scenes, facial expressions that were just a little too fond to be hetero. Naturally, Studio Mir applied the same principles in Voltron. All of this was run by the showrunners before getting approved btw. So, no, this isn't just Studio Mir doing whatever.
Anyway, expressions are THE most important thing in animation. The facial expression you give your character determines how they feel so naturally a lot of care and attention goes into perfecting that.
In the episode where the Blue Lion gets stolen by Nyma, Keith is shown to have been talking to Rolo, the guy who was accompanying Nyma. And according to his facial expression, a smirk on his face and his eyes following Rolo, it seemed like Keith was... what's that? Flirting with Rolo! Gasp! Could he be... g-g-g-g-gayyy!!!
There's more in this episode. In scenes with Lance, and specifically with Lance, the background uses the same bisexual lighting utilized in LoK to imply Korrasami. This was obviously intentional because we've seen Studio Mir use these techniques before. They meant to imply Lance is bi.
It doesn't end there. When animating facial expressions the one to express a deep sense of fondness or more specifically, love, the inner ends of the eyebrows are raised and there should be a soft or small smile.
Exhibit A:
Exhibit B:
Exhibit C:
And so... so much more. Actually a whole mountain more. Hetero way to look at your rival.
And if you're looking for ideas for totally hetero scenes you can have with your rival, you could totally have a heart-to-heart in the sunset, the kind of lighting usually thought of as romantic, while you look at each other with a deep and soft fondness in your eyes offering a kind of comfort you can only get from each other and no one else.
Incredibly hetero, no gay here.
If you still need MORE proof... you're an idiot.
Moving along, you're probably asking "well, all of this seems fine and well, but none of this makes being angry over it justified? So what exactly is the deal here?" Let me tell you, dear reader. The deal here... is queerbait.
Queerbait:
Queerbaiting is when the writers of a show deliberately write a character to be heavily implied to be gay or queer in some way, luring a queer audience in with the idea of a canon queer character or relationship, but with no real intention of actually going through with it.
Klance and all the chemistry between the two characters wasn't accidental, wasn't just a little unimportant thing, it was completely intentional. The animation that the showrunners approved was intentional. The writing of scenes between the two and the way their relationship is portrayed is intentional. The forced proximity in climbing up the elevator shaft in that one episode is intentional.
Don't believe me? Before season 7 was released there was a sort of promotional QnA panel at I think a convention thing for it. During this panel, it was confirmed that there would be a canon queer character in season 7. And not a new side character, an existing one. Of the main cast. Naturally the fandom went crazy, I mean, a canonical queer character! That's great news! So everyone started speculating on who and the main suspects were obviously Lance and Keith with all the evidence suggesting they're bi and gay, respectively. Or if they were really cool they could have Pidge/Katie be canonically trans. It definitely drummed up a lot of hype for season 7.
So on the day of the season's release everyone was really excited to find out who would be the canon gay character! And... they give us one hardly a second long scene with Shiro looking at a plaque with the name of his dead fiance on it. Shiro isn't even that upset he just looks... mildly sad. Then it's pretty much not really brought up again in any significant way.
Sure, Shiro is canonically gay and that's cool and all and I'm glad there's a canon gay character, but... I mean, come on, you can do better. There wasn't even any sort of evidence or anything that implied Shiro was at all gay until this very moment as opposed to other characters that had a lot of clues and evidence and buildup to imply that they are queer.
Especially with the way they talked about it on the panel, like it was something big, like it was going to be crazy and important. Like it would blow us away. Only for... this. It can't help but feel so... intentional.
They knew their audience, and they knew the audience was predominantly made up of queer people. They knew that saying a character would be confirmed gay would only make the views on season 7 skyrocket. They never actually cared about queer representation. Only about how much money they can make off us.
Klance shippers aren't "delusional" and they're not seeing things that aren't there. All of this just confirms it. This entire time, all these seasons of soft fond glances, of intentional dialogue and lighting. It was all just one big lie. Just bait on a hook made to catch money.
So yeah. I think the anger over it is pretty justified. The anger over being tricked again and again. I tell you, I'm fucking sick of getting into a new show or franchise and thinking "finally, finally some queer rep" thinking that maybe just maybe this time it'll be different, it won't be like the other times. And then... it's exactly the same. Over and over. I think it's justified that queer people are angry over being screwed over time and time again by greedy showrunners. Maybe not death threats, but we at least have the right to be angry.
Klance could have been such a great and well-written queer romance that could've made Voltron such a better show especially considering the shitshow season 8 was, but no. No the writers are fucking cowards. (and also incredibly incompetent when it comes to writing Lance's character specifically, butchering his entire character and personality in favor of the hetero romance he has with Allura which pisses me off so fucking bad)
Oh well. I guess it's just something else that could've been... TIME TO READ SOME "FIX-IT"S ON AO3!
….
SO GIVE ME ABOUT 2 HOURS…
yeah no dw uh if it's easier you can put it through text to speech though I feel like tts reads super slow idk if you can speed it up or smth
DID YOU DIE LMAOOOOOO
i did momentarily , but now i am BACK momentarily
i honestly really did like reading them. lemme tell u tho i knew NOTHING first reading
but i really do like how you state like your opinion? but it’s one that in assuming that most of the community would agree with
and ur points actually make sense and correlate with one another to make a point
you also hook the reader really well, which i appreciated since my attention span can be very short
so overall, really good!!! i think people in these fandoms would listen to you!!
thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed reading it, I struggled to write this honestly, it took me weeks cause I had to like check facts, rewrite bits that felt off, proofread, etc etc. It's so tiring 🥲 so it's good that you liked it
Triple baka is so silly.
Anyway, forget Lalalala or Okokokok, which triple baka person are you?
(Personally I think I'm either neru or teto lmao)
Dreaming where have you been
DREAMING WHY WONT YOU ANSWER ME 😭
You're the only other person who's on this webbed site as much as I am
Dreaming I'm act really worried abt you rn.
I have an idea for a show. Yk the one you said you wanted to make with me. I can tell you abt it but you'd need to be here for me to tell you abt it.
I wish I was a youtuber just so I could film myself playing The Evil Within 2 so everyone can witness the greatness.
So this man is actively trying to kill the character you play as and he also kidnapped your daughter and killed multiple people meaning you actively have reason to hate him and he is a terrible person but... hear me out-
Is he maybe a psychopath? Yeah probably. But like... he's just mansplain manipulate manwhore-ing his way through life and there's nothing wrong with that. He killed people? God forbid he has hobbies, jeez, guys, calm down.
Anyway I bring this up cause this guy is, I'm sorry to say, AN ARTIST, and he likes to do photography. Specifically of people dying, but photography nonetheless. So in this one interaction there's some writing that appears on the wall that he wrote and it says... "smile for me" and my immediate first reaction, instead of the normal, sane reaction of, I'd assume, "fuck off", was "omg are you flirting with me 😊"
I must reiterate that this man is ACTIVELY attempting to assassinate us. He wants us DEAD. Immediately after you see the writing on the wall he literally sends these monsters to KILL YOU.
Honestly "smile for me" is most definitely a threat because it implies he's taking a picture of you and, as I've said, he likes taking a picture of the moment of people's deaths, but it's okay, he was totally flirting.
I've just come to the terrible realization that I will inevitably have to kill him in order to finish the game 😔
This is not an "I can fix him" situation btw, I absolutely CANT fix him, but honestly if he wasn't a psychopathic murderer I don't think I would like him.
I don't want him fixed. I want him majorly fucked up and fucking crazy.
I wanna animate this single genshin official art so bad but I cant find a good software on my pc
(Edit: chat I just found out that there is a capcut for pc let's goo)
WHICH ONE WOAH
Show post...
The scaramouche one
there's a lot sobs /nm /nbr
Alright bitches and bro's and non binary hoes
I have woken up yet again on the verge of a mental breakdown (but my parents give no shits about it so 🤷)
And I shall make it everyone's problem today.
good morning. I have not slept :3
If nothing else, I want to make the most unsettling, crazy, questionable yet so so intriguing kids show ever. The kind that you watched on TV when you were younger and because of how just so weird it was it just... sticks with you.
A show like Courage the Cowardly Dog.
If I die before I achieve this dream, someone better bring me back to life. Learn necromancy, discover some way to reverse time, just whatever you do, do not let me die without making a freaky ass show.
Damn okay so I can I make the show with you because I have zero motivation to do anything else
(And btw about your book, as expected my parents said no 😔)
Alright, I just need to lie down in bed and hallucinate for a couple of minutes or maybe hours depending on my aura and general vibe/overall current energy level and then I'll come back to you with a maybe could be fire idea for a show.
(damn that's a shame. Don't even know how you would've gotten it to me in the first place honestly, I don't live in America idk if that's clear or like what)
Damn okay schizophrenia time I see
(Oh, I don't live in America either. Now the thing is, how would've done it is that I switched my server on Amazon/any other online shop and IF you felt nice enough to give me your address[not here, somewhere else], I could change the adress on the online shopping app to that address, and you won't have to pay for it when you get it unless I choose a cash on delivery option :D)
it's the way I come up with all of my good ideas. (I never write or actually work on any of them, but, shhhh, we don't talk abt that part)
(I mean I kind of guessed that would be a way to do it. Well, thanks anyway! It's nice that you tried!)
Man me and my sisters watched this "guess the cartoon by theme song" thing and the fucking wave of nostalgia...
Anyway, here are some of my favorite nostalgic shows:
Rugrats (my sisters hate this one, and I'll tell you... I don't blame them.)
Rocket Power
Shaun the Sheep (one of the best shows ever, no question)
Mr Bean (one of the best shows ever as well)
Teen Titans (NOT GO. My Superhero Movie goes hard though, but that is ALL that I will give that stupid show)
Chalk Zone
Dexter's Labratory
Totally Spies
Kim Possible
Courage the Cowardly Dog
W.I.T.C.H.
Winx Club (ik this and WITCH are like rivals basically, but I think it's stupid to argue cause fundamentally they are two different shows each with their own strong and weak points so it's pointless to compare them (I always liked WITCH more))
Kick Buttowski
Inspector Gadget
Lazy Town
Danny Phantom
The Penguins of Madagascar
TMNT (2003-2006)
Monster High
Ever After High
Regular Show
Phineas and Ferb
Adventure Time
The Amazing World of Gumball
Uncle Grandpa (I used to be OBSESSED with this show. I was ALWAYS watching it)
The original teen titans is sooo good though
I only watched it when I went to hotels and stuff bc other than that I watched anime and shit on my tv
But I saw the "The End" episodes and omg?????
This shit crazzyy
BRO Teen Titans is so good, I loved that shit bro.
I don't remember the ending all that well, but I very vividly remember that one scene where Robin SINGLEHANDEDLY just beat up all the other Teen Titans and absolutely kicked their asses. There is a reason he is the leader of the Teen Titans. Like damn bro...
Is it obvious I had a crush on him as a child... it's not obvious, right?
Anyway that and the opening. Such a great opening, absolute banger, major vibe.
WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE YOU KNOW WHO TO CALL 🗣🔥🔥🗣🔥
TEEN TITANS! 🔥🗣🗣🗣
Idk much ABT it but yeah it is kinda obvious lmaooo
T-E-E-N T-I-T-AN-S TEEN TITANS!! LETS GO! 🗣️🗣️🔥🔥
Child raven or whatever the purple girl's name was looked cute ig
Her name is Raven and she was a cute child like- bro, she was so itty bitty and just... 😭
This just reminds me of how I have vague memories of TMNT but I very very VERY vividly remember Michaelangelo in the opening in his skateboard because I ACTIVELY did not care except for when Mikey was on screen. I keep making jokes about it like "lmao imagine being in love with an anthropomorphic turtle, couldn't be me." As a child I was honestly obsessed with Mikey.
Look at miku here.
I'm so obsessed with Gorillaz it's actually eating me alive
Oc I made originally in roblox but decided to make in picrew:
Name: Yuuto Kiseki.
Age: 16. (Cursed Era Arc version)
Birthdate: 4th of June, 2008.
Zodiac:Gemini.
Occupation:
mafia affiliationsnone.Social Status: General.
Favourite music artist: Lana Del Rey, Kikuo, MARETU, Pinocchio-P
Aesthetic:City Core(?)
Mental illnesses, if any: ADHD, minor PTSD.
Hobbies/Skills:Butterfly Knife tricks, drawing.
Family?: Her parents are very much alive, but her brother went missing ages ago. She ran away from home at 11.
Parental figure, if any: N/A.
Partner:(In crime)Eiko. (In love)N/A.
Sexuality:Lesbian+Asexual.
Pronouns:She/Her.
Random fun fact about me ig:
I'm double jointed on all my fingers AND I've memorised the entire World's End Dancehall dance(Miku's version)
I love world's end dancehall
Fr though
Can you be the Luka to my miku? :3
Yes :3 (I can't dance but I'll try)
Luka is my fav vocaloid I love her
Luka's my second fav after rin
My second fav is miku :33
I actually plan on drawing her one day... I don't know when
Smile is the single worst horror movie I have seen in my life and I am so so incredibly fucking disappointed. For multiple reasons. Tw: suicide mention
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1. It is just not scary.
For all the people who walked out of the theatre terrified and going and making tik tok videos abt how "omg Smile was so scary I'm never gonna recover" I was expecting to be shaking in my boots, I was expecting to piss my pants, I was expecting to not even be able to get through the movie. And yet, 90% of the time was spent with a completely blank face. The other 10% was spent rolling my fucking eyes. The only time I was even MILDLY scared was in that one scene in the car with her sister, and that was just a cheap jumpscare.
There's no atmosphere in the movie, I'm not on the edge of my seat, I'm not watching at every moment for fear of something scary popping up. No. I genuinely did not give two shits actually. I was just waiting for the movie to just end. You can not cut this tension with a knife because there was none. Tension? More like tension headache. Cause that's what this movie gave me.
2. The story is stupid
Smile follows this lady who gets infected by this... virus? Bacteria? Fungus? No, yeah, it's never actually explained what exactly the Smile monster is, it just... is. She gets infected by watching someone who has the virus thing die, therefore transferring it to her. This virus causes her to have weird creepy hallucinations typically with a recurring theme of people smiling eerily.
These hallucinations cannot actually harm her, but they sure can harm her FUCKING CAT. So yeah. For all the "scary" shit going on on screen, the MC is actually completely perfectly safe, just incredibly paranoid and with gaps in her memory. She's also a danger to those around her. The MC is, effectively, the villain against her own will. She's also going fucking crazy.
So she finds out that there is no way to kill this thing and the only way to transfer it from one person to another is if the person who has the disease thing commits suicide and someone watches them do it. The person who watched it happen is now the one who is affected. So she's got this genius idea of "what if I just live all alone out in the middle of nowhere and not talk to anyone ever and just never kms then I've trapped the virus and when I die of old age instead of suicide, this thing dies with me." Which would be pretty smart... IF SHE ACTUALLY STUCK TO THE PLAN.
No. The end of the movie is her killing herself in front of someone. Good fucking job. 10/10. You fucking failed you stupid ass baby loser.
The idea in and of itself is not exactly super duper shit. It's the way it's shown in the story. The way it plays out.
The MC is never in any actual danger throughout the film.
You never really care about any of the other characters except for vaguely.
Unnecessary cat death. (I'm very fucking pissed about it I will never not be pissed)
They come up with a good plan to kill the monster at the end, and it would have at least ended the movie nicely if they stuck with the plan, but it's just the fact that she, in her big smart brain decided "what if I just... didn't do that."
The entire movie is just "ooh she's seeing creepy shit" yeah okay I see creepy shit all the time, she's not special.
Psychosis can be terrifying to the people experiencing it. But on the outside looking in, the person just looks crazy. With a monster that is essentially just severe psychosis... 🤷♀️
It's just kinda shit and the ending is the absolute shittiest part of it and it will never not piss me off because WHY THE FUCK DID SHE DO THAT SHIT IS SHE STUPID DID SOMEONE DROP HER AS A CHILD DID SHE GET BONKED ON THE HEAD WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ACTUALLY
3. No one in the movie is even mildly interesting
Our characters include:
One of the worst MCs ever made
Basic suburban mom
Boyfriend
White guy
...
No yeah that's pretty much all of them, and none of them even have super prominent roles except for MC and maybe White Guy, but he shows up like halfway into the film so who really gives a shit.
This movie is actually so uninteresting I was this close 🤏 to falling asleep while watching it.
If I had to describe Smile in one word?
Boring.
Bland.
Uninteresting.
Plain.
Annoying.
Headache.
Over-hyped.
Overrated.
Stupid.
Need I go on? I think you get the point by now that, in my opinion, punching myself in the face would be better entertainment than watching this movie.
Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk.
I'd rather die than be boring.
i don’t understand how people go about their day being so ordinary
like it’s as if they FEAR having fun or like
being unique
🤷♀️
idk, i had a LOT of those types of friends last year. they were extroverted but got embarrassed easily if they did something remotely out of line
ikr like literally relax you can do whatever you want forever as long as no one is getting hurt
Honestly I think my friends would like me less if I wasn't one the verge of losing my sanity. Who else would ask "who fucked a fish?" Upon seeing the fishmen in One Piece if not me?
Without my twisted mind to remind them that the entire world and universe and everyone they know and the past however many years could all just be a really vivid dream and they'll wake up in like 2012 the next morning, how would they ever survive?
Real friends are the ones that stick with you despite all the crazy shit you say and do. You can be you, no one's gonna pull out a gun and shoot you if you step out of line for one second.
see like it was my bestfriends birthday party, and i’ve known her for TEN years. like we have been THAT locked in…and she invited these 2 other girls, one that claimed to be her “best best best bestttt friend”, (the friend to isa,) and another girl who had a lot of issues with, but was also her friend
tell me why i asked isa if we wanna play just dance and she says: “yea ofc!” and the two other girls say: “oh that’s embarrassing” … ITS JUST DANCE HOLY SHIT??? but the entire time at the party me and her were just laughing cuz like, we DONT think what others think of us
lemme remind these hoes that i’m the only friend that sleeps over at her house and that her parents ACTUALLY like…
but yeah, i hate friends who put you down for being YOU
What? It is literally Just Dance, grown adults play Just Dance. What's wrong with Just Dance?
Imagine being so pissed at seeing someone else basically just existing. Not even doing anything to you. Like get actual help and mind your own damn business.
And to your own friends too like... treating your own friends like that. You must be fun at parties. Like wtf bro. Get help actually.
exactly!!! a lot of them were jealous of me. and it’s not to help my ego, it’s the TRUTH. i had a LOT of friends sabotage me to prevent me getting what i want-one of my closest friends stopped talking to me because i quote on quote “stole presidency from her”…i felt so sorry for her 😭.
and thank you!! i am fun, like in general when you get to know me as a person, i can be VERY helpful and a VERY good friend. what’s sad to say is that i always involve myself with the bad people, i only have about 2 real irl friends lol 😭😭😭😭. and i have TONS of “friends”. i mean, i had a friend group of 30 PEOPLE. it was insane. like i hate if i sound as if im glazing myself but i was really popular at my old school…
this new school im actually really liking my friend group!!! i have 2, kinda small but i still talk to a LOT of people. everybody is so nice like i love my friends, super non-toxic
Me when im looking for more ideas on an oc pinterest board and pinterest reccomends images of men who look exactly like the oc with women like NOOOOO HES SUPPOSED TO BE GAY 😔😔😔😔
My pinterest recurringly has been giving me random anime soukoku stuff on my outfits for my oc's board like...
Uh...
That's not what it's for..?
oh wow 😭
that's crazy, idk, pinterest just be making stuff up atp
Pinterest on drugs
I love how people are talking about Dipper's threat to Bill like "omg that's so scary" meanwhile Mabel is threatening to take this interdemensional demon of great unknown power and EAT HIM LIKE A DAMN NACHO CHIP
Like Dipper's threat is scary don't get me wrong
But Mabel is actually planning on grabbing Bill by his pussy, dipping him in fucking GUACAMOLE and straight up BITING HIS ENTIRE HEAD OFF
Like Dipper's threat is at least a normal "I'm gonna kill you" threat, Mabel's threat is "I am going to eat you alive"
I WANT THE BOOK OF BILL I WILL ACTUALLY KILL TO GET IT
EVERYTHING EVERY SINGLE GRAVITY FALLS RELATED PIECE OF MEDIA WAS RELEASED BEFORE I WAS EVER A FAN OF THE SHOW, BEFORE I EVER EVEN WATCHED A SINGLE EPISODE
I NEVER HAD THE CHANCE TO BE THERE AND TALK THEORIES AND LORE AND CHARACTERIZATION AND GEEK OUT OVER FINDING COOL STUFF IN THE BLACKLIGHT VERSION OF THE THIRD BOOK OR THE WACKY ADVENTURES COVERED IN THE COMICS
AND NOW IS MY ONLY CHANCE MY ONLY HOPE TO BE A FUCKING LOSER NERD THE WAY I WAS ALWAYS MEANT TO BE AND THE ONLY THING BETWEEN ME AND THAT REALITY IS A DAMN PAYWALL BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY THE BOOK ISNT FUCKING FREE AND I HAVE LITERALLY TWO DOLLARS
I COULD ASK FOR IT FOR MY BIRTHDAY BUT THATS TWO MONTHS AWAY TWO MONTHS THE CONVERSATION AROUND THE BOOK WONT BE THE SAME TWO MONTHS FROM NOW
I NEED THIS BOOK NOW I NEED IT BEFORE I ACTUALLY RIP MY OWN SKIN OFF MY BODY PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEA-
How much does it cost? I could buy it for you :P (/hj)
like 20 dollars
sigh 😔 if only someone could actually buy it for me
I could do it, but I might have to ask my parents, so uhh...
I'll update you in like a day if they agree
WHAT ACTUALLY ACTUALLY
LIKE FR FR
Mhm but I'm going to have to ask permission from my parents but we'll see more chances that they don't agree so please don't get your hopes up! Last thing I want is you being dissappointed :)
can we all agree that the marias need more recognition
and need to win a solo grammy for their song "no one noticed" even tho its already been tiktokfied
but
its SUCH a good song like
i personally think it should win